Not sure I am strong enough to be alone....this is the feeling I cannot shake. I keep thinking maybe it's not so bad, it's better than being alone. I know deep down I deserve someone who takes care of me like I will take care of him, but then the lonliness takes over and makes me think at least he was here. I know, logically, that it will get better, but my heart just feels like it is breaking more each day. The weekends are the worse, dodging questions from people I see at the soccer fields. Everyone thought we are the perfect family, I am good at making things appear happy, mostly for the children, and I guess I was thinking if I pretend....maybe it will happen. Is wanting an equal, someone to be there for you, someone who will go for a walk with you or a bike ride, just because he knows you enjoy it, is this too much to ask for/want. Maybe I watched too many Disney movies when I was younger.
Replies
I think we all want this. I also believe that if you were truly not happy then the whole entire family suffers. The beginning is the worst...it gets easier if you do not want to settle then there must be something out there for you. Take is one day at a time, one weekend at a time. We are here for you.
It is not to much to want. It will get easier, and start by doing those things yourself!! You do these things you want to do, and you will cross with someone else doing the same. Someone is out there thinking like you, and wanting these things to. Hold your head high, and reach for what you want.