I have not been on for awhile because I knew I was not doing what I was suppose to do: not drink. I have been drinking daily and eating terribly too. I feel horrible now. Fat, full, like there is a weight on chest. Disappointed in myself. But something happened to me over night. This morning I decided that I had enough. I researched GERD, started on a 14 day treatment for reflux. I am not going to drink alcohol, coffee, eat chocolate and all the other foods that make me feel bad. I can do this and I will loose weight, feel better and be happy.
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I know how you feel... I have been on this roller-coaster myself for a long time. Seems like you have many goals, which is awesome! but sometimes especially when you might be overwhelmed, just pick one or two (only for a couple of days)... a couple of little wins might be just what you need. GOOD LUCK!!!
and just to let you know, although it is tempting to NOT come here when you are failing... that is when I find I need to come here. And admit that I am failing... Everyone here has been there, and they might have some useful advise or at least a virtual shoulder to cry on. smooches.