The summer is flying by and before I know it school will be starting. I am so NOT READY to let go of summer...so much to do yet. The Avonex side effects have become quite minimal--more fatigue the next day and sometimes a headache, but that's really about it. I'm glad the side effects are manageable now. Is the Avonex helping? I'm not sure. I am concerned that the disease might be progressing due to a couple of things that have occured this summer. I guess time will tell.    At the lake this past week I was playing water volleyball and water badmitton. I kept falling down everytime I tired to hit the ball or the birdie. All I had to do was lean a bit to the left or right and boom! Down I went. I thought it was pretty funny and I kept laughing at myself. I'm not sure what my nieces and nephews thought nor my sister or brother. Mike gave me his hand nearly every time I fell down and helped me to my feet. He is such a wonderful man; I am so lucky to be married to him.     Another thing that happened this summer was my leg falling asleep after sitting in one position for too long. I felt it 'going to sleep,' but was reading and didn't bother switching positions. My entire right leg fell asleep to the extent that I could not move my leg. I couldn't even so much as wiggle a toe. This has never happened to me before and it was scary. I literally had to take both hands and physically lift my leg up and shake it to get some feeling back. Within a couple of minutes it was fine again, but while I couldn't move it, it was really freaky and frightening. I've noticed that my legs and arms fall asleep much more quickly then they used to. I don't know if this is MS (I assume it is) or just getting older (could be that too!). Since I had the ultrasound that measures blood flow in the arms and legs last October and the results were good, I assume it isn't a circulation problem.     I went to my morning class today and much to my dismay, discovered that I had totally forgotten about the reaction paper that was due. My memory is terrible lately. I get frustrated going into a room and then just standing there until I can remember why I am there--what I wanted to get or do.     Back to the water 'falls': Jack told me that he didn't want me to play on his team (volleyball). I ignored him and he told me again that he did not want me to play the game. The fact that my 16 year old son would say this too me was surprising. I told him that I was going to continue to play. Then he made a remark about how I kept falling all of the time and he didn't want me on his team. This really hurt! I quit playing and got out of the water. I felt like crying, but held back.I was so angry with him! This afternoon, I realized why Jack probably said what he did. Seeing me fall time after time made my MS real to him and he is probably afraid of losing his mother. He lost his birth mother when he was put into foster care and has really only known me as his mom since. I think that he is scared of losing me, too. He won't admit it, but I think I may have figured out his anger. It wasn't that he was so angry with me, but he was angry with what the disease was doing to my balance and he didn't want to see it. No outward signs, no MS--at least for Jack. If only life was that simple!    I hope that my paper will not be docked points because I forgot about it. Do I dare use the MS memory excuse? I don't know for sure if it is truly a valid (memory) excuse and I don't want 'pity'.   Would I have forgotten about it if I didn't have MS? I don't know.     I have been taking the LDN sporatically--I think it may be creating nasuea for me the next day. I'm not positive and only time will tell. I had initially thought that this drug was without side effects--maybe not?     I have been exercising more--walking primarily and gardening. It feels good to be involved in physical activity and my shorts have become pretty loose--a least a couple of pairs--but they weren't tight at all before.  Still and all, I'd like to shed at least twenty pounds over the next 8 to 10 weeks. I wonder if this is a realistic goal?   Michelle