Mum............
So here I am , sat in bed on my laptop about to pour my heart out to strangers . How sad am I. Thats right I am sad , so very very very sad. I have cried so hard today my face is a mess. Its sheer frustration , if I had the strength to punch something very hard I would , I need a release for all this. Im trying so hard to turn it back on itself and make it work for me after all its water precious energy.
I can't understand why my own kids just don't seem to care, I mean I know in their hearts they do but they seem to expect me to be the same as always, doing everything for them (they are over 17 and 21 by the way) . I can't understand how they can't see the hurt they are causing me with simple things like leaving the kitchen a tip , not picking up empty glasses etc. I still get mum wheres my ......... Mum did you get ......... Mum the dog needs to go to the vet............ Mum when are you going food shopping............ Oh Mum I made you a cup of tea two hours ago surely you don't want another one.................... Mum my top isn't ironed.................. Mum wake up mum wake up I want to ask you something (completely unimportant) ...........
I love them with all my heart and we've been through difficult times together BUT I FEEL SO SAD
Anyways lets hope the next journal entry will be a little brighter
I can't understand why my own kids just don't seem to care, I mean I know in their hearts they do but they seem to expect me to be the same as always, doing everything for them (they are over 17 and 21 by the way) . I can't understand how they can't see the hurt they are causing me with simple things like leaving the kitchen a tip , not picking up empty glasses etc. I still get mum wheres my ......... Mum did you get ......... Mum the dog needs to go to the vet............ Mum when are you going food shopping............ Oh Mum I made you a cup of tea two hours ago surely you don't want another one.................... Mum my top isn't ironed.................. Mum wake up mum wake up I want to ask you something (completely unimportant) ...........
I love them with all my heart and we've been through difficult times together BUT I FEEL SO SAD
Anyways lets hope the next journal entry will be a little brighter
Replies
Oh you poor darling.So very sorry that I didn\'t know this journal was here.I am so sorry that you are struggling to keep up with family life when you are so low in energy.I hear you and I care.I can certainly understand your tears as I have severe cfs and a family also.My young granddaughter often complains that I never do anything exciting with her because I am always sick. It really gets to me.Also my 31yr old daughter has had a mum with cfs her entire life and my son also has to handle it since he was 4 yrs old.True story . It\'s not easy.
Your kids just aren\'t aware of how sick you really are.They don\'t understand just yet .It is up to you to make them aware . I\'m sure they will lift their game then and feel more compassion for you.Hang in there and rest.Try not to worry
Warm hugs and happy days xo
Meant to mention also that my son is now 37 yrs old.Just because I have been ill for such an incredibly long time, it certainly doesn\'t mean that you will suffer the same misfortune.xo