missing you

Stevan,
 
Well the new year is here and I cried most of the day yesterday because you were not here with me and our kids.  It was a tough day like all days since you passed but yesterday was awful!  I miss you more and more each day, I want your touch, your arms around me but it will never happen again and the thought of that just brings me to tears.  How could this happen we were suppose to grow old together not just me.  It was suppose to be me and you Stevan.  I miss you making me laugh over some dumb joke you had or the smile on your face and your smell.  I still sleep with your T-shirt and sweatshirt you had on the night you died, it doesn't smell like you anymore but I need to hold you and that is the closest thing I have.  It helps some but nothing really does right now.  I will try to write in this journal more often it may help me through this terrible nightmare.  I miss you and love you Always & Always, Forever & Ever.
Love
Laur