Lonely
My husband passed away from prostate cancer 12-1-13 at the age of 59. We did everything together & I feel so lonely. He was a part of me & sometimes I feel like I just can't function. I don't feel like cleaning the house or anything. I just want to sleep. I have 2 adult girls & 1 adult step son & they all have their own families but even when they're with me, it's just not the same as having my husband here. When I go to the store, I just start crying in the car. I get invited to go places with other people but I just don't feel like being around others but then again I don't want to be alone. I just don't know how to cope with this.
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My heart aches for you.....the first months after losing a spouse are so overwhelming. What you feel is the way we all felt in those first days -- numbness, inability to focus on anything, not wanting to do anything. It takes TIME - and lots of it - before you begin to adjust to life with that \"big hole\" in the middle of it where your husband used to be. I have been a widow 5 yrs. now, and remember well the raw pain of those early days. I thought it helped me to accept invitations - even tho\' I didn\'t really want to go. Being with other people gets you out of that empty house for a while. \"Coping\" is a day-by-day process. There are good books on grief; there are local grief support groups and some people benefit from a grief counselor. I changed the comforter etc. in my bedroom, and also the furniture in our small den/sitting room a few months after my husband\'s death. His empty chair just dominated that room and I felt I could not bear to see it all day each day. Others won\'t even part with a comb & toothbrush -- we are all different. There is no shortcut through grief, and no easy way to lessen the hurt. I am a Christian and my faith in God sustained me through my husband\'s illness and death. I am still involved in our community church and thankful for the friends there. If you would like to send me a private message any time, I\'ll be glad to encourage you any way possible. This forum is a good place to come for support and compassion.
Wishing you peace - Doye
Thank you so much for your words of encouragement. It does help to know that everyone here is going through the same things I am.