Okay, Mom.  I am going to write it down here what I have been too afraid to say out loud and to anyone.  I am angry at you.  I am mad at you.  How dare you leave me the way you did?  How dare you ask me to look after your loser husband and not tell me how much I meant to you in your life instead?  How dare you make me feel like I am not worthy of love.  How dare you not make me feel special.  How dare you not put me in front of all those boyfriends.  How dare you leave this mess behind for us to go through.  Did you really take care of me all those years as a kid or was I just there.  Was I your priority?  Was I?  I look at my son and think how could anything, ANYTHING be more important than him.  Did you feel that way about me or was finding the next boyfriend or husband more important?  Why didn't you get therapy for that?  Why didn't you tell me not to let anyone take me for granted, that I was worthy of only the very best? Why did you teach me that I should always accommodate others and not put myself first?  Why did you leave me?  Why didn't you fight?  You must know I am angry.  That is why you haven't shown me.