....

I feel lonely...I am all messed up :( I am stuck in this horrible female body and a boy within just can't wait anymore to come out.I hate apsolutely everything about female body.Why couldn't i have just been born as a regular boy? I always wanted to be a guy,to grow up and become a man,i had like this fabulous imagination of me driving fast cars and watching box and have a gun like i saw in a movie once there was this guy and i thought i wish i could grow to be a man like that,from that movie.i was 13 years old then.but that's not when my story begins.it begins much earlier,when i was like 5 and imagining i was Tarzan,the jungle boy.i remember i never wanted wearing swiming bra,when we went swinmming i never liked pink or flowers or dresses or dolls.i didn't want to play with barbies,i always wondered why wasn't i born a boy.i liked to play with cars and trucks and swords,trains,tools and toy construction area that i had.i didn't like mermaids or ponies,i liked lions and tigers,all the wild animals.i didn't like dancing or balet nor tea parties.i wasn't interested in dress ups.i liked running,jumping,climbing trees,riding bike fastly,playing with water guns,always wanted skatebord....and stuff like that didn't change when i grew older,i was interested in cars and computers,i thought bmx and snowboards were cool,i liked bars,went to gym,i got myself weights....i never cared for purses,make up,leggings,tall boots,those shorts girls like to wear on summer.i would never put on leotard,i dislike tight shirts,turtlenecks,and girl activities such as rollerblading or painting nails....