monday;1232 am uk timeit has been a while i haven't entered any on my journal.i felt the days that had gone, went ever so quickly that i can't even remember anything significant.my mind seems muddled up!i feel sometimes at one point i think i'm going to lose it.I went to see our nurse in our occupationl health last thursday and tell her what's goin on for her to understand the whole picture why i went off sick for two weeks and why my line manager is sending me for assessment whether my sickness is related to  working extra hours. it came to the point where i can't avoid telling her what's happening to me personally and there i realize it's still really hurting me.i thought these past few weeks that i haven't been crying very much and there were more episodes of fun and laughter is already a sign that i'm getting better but i think really ...i was just able to repress it at the back of my mind by working hard,goin out with friends doing a little bit of charity work,or generally trying to move on with life....but it is really frustrating to think that it might be  like this forever.