3am
So what do you do when it's 3am and you cant sleep? Write here? Playing games on my phone is a little pointless when some depend on players to play with. (ie:words with friends) Not in the mood to crochet or knit, photography at this hour is Out of the question haha. That's work more than play haha. Watching tv is more paid advertisments than anything. Boo, what do you do?
The bad thing is that if I do nothing I get depressed and sink into a slump and start over-anylizing everything. Like why I'm single. 3 years, nothing. Probably because nobody wants to deal with someone who gets depressed or has anxiety every once in a while. Meds help a lot but there are moments where it takes over and ya just can't help it. But I don't get the single thing. I'm a Christian, Love God more than anything, love sports, especially Football, Huge Panthers Fan, (We will go all the way), I believe a woman should cook and clean for her man, take care of him, not be his slave but take care of him Very well! I'm not terrible looking, not the skinniest bitch alive but I'm working on the last 30 lbs, I've lost 50 in the last year. So what the heck. Whatever dude. It is what it is.
I'll be a coffee lovin, sushi lovin, God lovin single woman hahaha! It just makes me depressed though that I'm alone, and I've heard the "You'll find someone" before haha. We'll see. Blah. Why should this bother me so much? It shouldn't!! I should happy being single. Grrr. Why can't someone just hand us the answers to the book of life and it be that simple. The Bible is great but doesn't give you answers on how to deal with this. Or does it? And I've missed it? Hmmm who knows! Preachers anyone?
The bad thing is that if I do nothing I get depressed and sink into a slump and start over-anylizing everything. Like why I'm single. 3 years, nothing. Probably because nobody wants to deal with someone who gets depressed or has anxiety every once in a while. Meds help a lot but there are moments where it takes over and ya just can't help it. But I don't get the single thing. I'm a Christian, Love God more than anything, love sports, especially Football, Huge Panthers Fan, (We will go all the way), I believe a woman should cook and clean for her man, take care of him, not be his slave but take care of him Very well! I'm not terrible looking, not the skinniest bitch alive but I'm working on the last 30 lbs, I've lost 50 in the last year. So what the heck. Whatever dude. It is what it is.
I'll be a coffee lovin, sushi lovin, God lovin single woman hahaha! It just makes me depressed though that I'm alone, and I've heard the "You'll find someone" before haha. We'll see. Blah. Why should this bother me so much? It shouldn't!! I should happy being single. Grrr. Why can't someone just hand us the answers to the book of life and it be that simple. The Bible is great but doesn't give you answers on how to deal with this. Or does it? And I've missed it? Hmmm who knows! Preachers anyone?
Replies
3 am photography would be kinda awesome as long as coyotes and other wild animals aren\'t involved. I don\'t have to tell you depression can be a strange animal at time, but it\'s great that you\'re being proactive and looking for answers, solutions, ideas of how to turn this thing around. Some people don\'t try that. You have a very creative mind and use that to maybe make a list (mental or paper) of things you want to do, you\'d like to do. I suppose like a \"bucket list\" but we don\'t need to call it that. My list has few things on it, just enough at the moment to be somewhat attainable. Things like where would you like to visit? Monuments or attractions in other places, things you LOVE. When I feel like I\'m in the shit the best thing I can do is simplify. Scrap and start small, then build from there.
It takes time to get yourself back to where you want to be, where you\'re most comfortable and can love you for you, that\'s a pretty good start. After that, once you have that power, that control to see the progress made it should feel pretty damn good.
I hit enter before I finished, also... you CAN do this, you WILL feel better and become a happy girl again. I don\'t set time tables for these things, everybody adjusts differently but I have this confidence in you.