About 6 months after I found out about the sperm donor thing is when he cheated on me on 11/17/14. He had been asking me to have another child and I was almost ready to start trying.
I figured out what he had done a short time later. And this is how he explained what happened. He was sad and felt bad about himself and had heard about web sights were women would ask for things and do things with men pay for them without admitting that is what they were doing. He said he wanted to get women to admit they were selling themselves. 'my thoughts who does this'. He had started talking to a couple women. He claimed she just showed up and demanded he sleep with her and treated to make a scene at his work if he did not. He said he freaked and did not think I would believe him if she did because of the past things. So he got a hotel room with her then came home after.
So after this I demand all his passwords and I lock the computer so he could not go on and hide things. I take his phone. He pleads with me not to leave and I stay. I go back and forth with what to do. I did not tell anyone because I love him and I cannot handle the way people will look at him. He acts truly sorry. I demand to know everything and he says he tells me. later I find he had been texting back and forth with her all that day before she came. I cannot read what he said but I know from the phone account there was a lot of texting between them. I do not know if I trust that she just showed up instead of him asking her to come.
I also start finding things he did not tell me from the past years. I find on his email graphic conversations with women he had said he would donate sperm to, references to pictures they had sent him. Him telling them to do things when he watched on there web cams. Things I never thought would come from this nice guy. Contact with actual hookers setting up times to meet. Memberships to dating web sites. I felt like every time I started to believe him I found something else.
I have given him back the internet ,I was trying to see if he would choose me, he did not. Now he spends a lot of time on the computer. He promises he is not doing anything bad not looking at pictures not talking to anyone in that way.
I am having a hard time believing him he is very smart and if he wanted to hide things he could. And I have seen in the past he is a good liar.
He is asking again to have another baby, I am scared.
I figured out what he had done a short time later. And this is how he explained what happened. He was sad and felt bad about himself and had heard about web sights were women would ask for things and do things with men pay for them without admitting that is what they were doing. He said he wanted to get women to admit they were selling themselves. 'my thoughts who does this'. He had started talking to a couple women. He claimed she just showed up and demanded he sleep with her and treated to make a scene at his work if he did not. He said he freaked and did not think I would believe him if she did because of the past things. So he got a hotel room with her then came home after.
So after this I demand all his passwords and I lock the computer so he could not go on and hide things. I take his phone. He pleads with me not to leave and I stay. I go back and forth with what to do. I did not tell anyone because I love him and I cannot handle the way people will look at him. He acts truly sorry. I demand to know everything and he says he tells me. later I find he had been texting back and forth with her all that day before she came. I cannot read what he said but I know from the phone account there was a lot of texting between them. I do not know if I trust that she just showed up instead of him asking her to come.
I also start finding things he did not tell me from the past years. I find on his email graphic conversations with women he had said he would donate sperm to, references to pictures they had sent him. Him telling them to do things when he watched on there web cams. Things I never thought would come from this nice guy. Contact with actual hookers setting up times to meet. Memberships to dating web sites. I felt like every time I started to believe him I found something else.
I have given him back the internet ,I was trying to see if he would choose me, he did not. Now he spends a lot of time on the computer. He promises he is not doing anything bad not looking at pictures not talking to anyone in that way.
I am having a hard time believing him he is very smart and if he wanted to hide things he could. And I have seen in the past he is a good liar.
He is asking again to have another baby, I am scared.
Replies
I am so sorry. I know the pain and anxiety of feeling like you have to constantly check up on your CS. Wondering what they\'re looking at; who they\'re talking to; what they\'re doing. It is very scary, especially, when they start talking babies. It confuses us and makes us more apt to stay. He is a smooth liar. Sounds a lot like my husband. I know the struggle. Prayers for you. Seriously consider leaving. At least consider it.