I said in my last entry that as wll as being positive , i would like to be more motivated. I guess meaning more motivated, like getting out of bed in the morning for starters, also i would like to be more motivated, goin out somewhere , any where but here most days.My Mom lives fairly close, but if i go i know she would like me to spend the night, but i would like to go just for a day trip.I have a sister who to lives closer, but she is at work most of the time.I also a friend who lives 7 klm from here, i could go and see her, and take her shopping or something.SOmedays just as the sun is setting i like to take a drive, past a lake or river and just as i'm feeling so inraptured of the essance and beauty of the blissfull seen, i would just like to drive off in the moment never to return,I have felt many times like that this past summer. I hope spring will be better for mew, i plan to garden and get my hands in to the soil, and if i have something like a garden to look after it might keep me from idolness, an isolation, and feeling sorry for my self. If it wasn't for the weeds in ourlives how would we move on and grow from our past and it's mistakes...