I did it! I survived what would have been our anniversary without contacting him:) I still feel sad lonely and scared but today was a big step in the right direction.
This is the first time I have gone through a breakup without dating right away. Usually I just find someone new so I don't have to feel the pain. Going through this pain now sometimes is so unbearable. I really thought we were going to get married. I thought if I left he would make an effort to show me he cared.
Letting go is so hard.It's admitting that it is really over. I keep thinking if we met to talk and he saw me he would realize how much he misses me. But he wants nothing to do with me...his exact words. That was a low point for me, felt like a knife going right through me. One day at a time I guess is all I can do.
This is the first time I have gone through a breakup without dating right away. Usually I just find someone new so I don't have to feel the pain. Going through this pain now sometimes is so unbearable. I really thought we were going to get married. I thought if I left he would make an effort to show me he cared.
Letting go is so hard.It's admitting that it is really over. I keep thinking if we met to talk and he saw me he would realize how much he misses me. But he wants nothing to do with me...his exact words. That was a low point for me, felt like a knife going right through me. One day at a time I guess is all I can do.
Replies
Day 2 of no contact! In feeling pretty good:) I was having a hard time with the fact that he didn\'t seem to care but after talking to my therapist I realize he may care but he will never show me. He couldn\'t show me emotions when we were a couple and he certainly is not going to show me now that we are not together. He wouldn\'t want to look weak. My x had said to me shortly after we broke up that he couldn\'t believe we were breaking up because he was a \"pussy\". I feel sad for him that is a really sad way to live your life. But it is no longer my problem. I cant fix him or change him. He is the only one who can make himself happy and he doesn\'t seem to want to. I will continue to make me happy one day at a time.
Today was a very bad day. I don\'t know why but when things go wrong in other areas it makes me feel even worse about the break up. I just wish it would all go away. im so tired:(
I\'m just starting this sad journey after 19 years of marriage. Me and my wife finally admitted that there is nothing left. We argue about the same subjects over and over and over. We can\'t seem to move forward. It\'s draining. I had to ask her if our marriage is so bad why do we keep doing this to ourselves. We realized it\'s because it\'s scary to start over. I think after our conversation today we both agreed it was over and we need to move on. This is going to be a long road but I can see I\'m not the only one going through tough times.