Tuesday, April 8, 2008 -- 10:30 AM   Sleep is still eluding me.  Sleepless nights do not make me a happy camper.  I find it hard staying awake.  Even when I try to sleep, I still cannot do that.   I called my sister this morning and talked with her about getting some medication for me.  These pills have to come from the mental health clinic where I go.  It is located fairly close to where she lives, so rather than my having to run all over town, she agreed to get the medicine for me.  That will be a very big help for me since I am beginning to feel worn out.   This afternoon I am going to see my physical therapist.  Last night, the pain in my legs and back was so bad that I wound up taking two pain pills at bedtime.  It was the first time I had to do that.  If things do not start getting better soon, I am just about ready to do my own amputation with a chain saw at my neck!    About three months ago, I stopped writing in my PTSD journal about the sexual abuse that I have had in my life.  I no longer wanted other people to know about my problems.  Nevertheless, I had already written far more than I ever intended to, so I think it is about time to start writing again and finish what I began.  It is not an easy subject to talk about, but I believe it is necessary for me to get a lot of thoughts and feelings that I have been hiding for many years out into the open.  Once I start something, I like to finish it.   Quote for Success:   “It is easy to get to the top after you get through the crowd at the bottom” Zig Ziglar