I have been very depressed today for a number of reasons. A good part of the day was spent copying journal entries from last July into an e-mail that will go to my psychologist. While I was working on them, I read most of them and became depressed in the process. It seemed as though I was complaining about something in almost every entry, and I do not like being a whiner. I really do not like bothering other people with my problems and being a burden on them. I can always lock my journal so that nobody can read my entries, but I think that by doing this it would be defeating a large part of the purpose of writing the entries to begin with. Early this afternoon, I stared temptation in the face and came away a winner. My "druggie" friend came visiting, and just seeing him sitting in my front room, caused me to start craving for some drugs. I really wanted them, but something helped me to avoid getting any. I think my Higher Power is looking over my shoulder these days. Another thing happened this evening, which really made me angry. My personal care provider was getting my clothing together so that she could wash it. While gathering it all, she came across a brand-new pair of pants that had been completely ruined by what appears to be bleach. It looked as though someone had hidden it way behind one of the laundry baskets. I do not know who did that, but I think it must have been one of the people who put me to bed at night. The one thing that I definitely do know for sure is that sometime on Monday I am going to make a complaint to my home health care agency about this. I feel that the agency should replace the pants at no cost to me. Tomorrow morning I am going to my sister's house to have an Easter breakfast/lunch with her and some of her family. I do not really want to go there, but since I have not gotten my wish for a foot of snow, it looks like I will not have any other option. HAPPY EASTER TO EVERYONE!
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