9:05 A.M. – M.S.T.   In some ways, last night was one of the strangest nights I have had in a long time...  That doesn't mean it was bad, just that it was a lot different from normal -- whatever normal may be.    I went to my Relapse Prevention Group, arriving there at about 5 PM, half an hour earlier than the meeting starts.  While I sat in the waiting room, I happened to look out into the hallway and just by chance noticed a sign taped onto the wall by their elevator.  It read, "Elevator broken, please use the stairs."  Since my meeting was on the third floor, I decided I needed to do something right away to find out what was going to happen to me.   I went to the reception desk, where new receptionist was sitting.  I pointed out my predicament to him and asked if he knew what they were going to do about the meeting room.  He said no, but that he would look around for someone to talk to about it.    While all this was going on, my mind kept going back to this past October when I had been attending a meeting on the third floor.  As the meeting ended, we were told that the elevator had quit working and that everybody would have to walk down the stairs.  As things turned out, they had to call the fire department to come carry me down the stairs.  Last night they got an electrician to look at the elevator and see what he could do to make it work.  He worked on it for a while, and then said it might work or it might not.  I decided right then and there that I was not willing to take the chance of going up to the third floor and getting stuck there again.   To make a long story short, it was decided to hold the meeting on the ground floor in the waiting room.  I had kind of been hoping they were going to cancel the meeting, but I was not that lucky.   During the meeting, there was one person who got wrapped up in the problems she had been having throughout the week.  She kept on talking, and talking, and talking. (Think of the Energizer Bunny!)  At various times, she would stop and apologize to the rest of us who were waiting our turns.  Then, at one point, she looked at me and told me to go ahead and take my turn.  I told her that since she was on a roll, to keep on going, which she did.   When it came to be my time to talk, I gave a short summary of the way my week had been going.  I was doing well until I said that my neighbor had tried to sell me some drugs during the weekend.  I told them that I had turned him down twice, as well as not answering two phone calls from him.    The group leader, as well as the members of the group, made it extremely clear that they thought I needed to somehow make a permanent break with my friend as a matter of my safety, if nothing else.  It was pointed out that if he was caught in my apartment with drugs on him, I was liable to be arrested as well as him.  They said that I either needed to phone in an anonymous tip concerning his dealing drugs, or else tell him that I did not want to have anything else to do with him.  I was also informed that when we meet again in two weeks, they are going to ask me what I have done about that situation.   I should interject here that during the past couple of weeks, something weird has come over me.  I have somehow developed a new sense of self-confidence and self-esteem.  I used to be afraid to talk to people, or to go anywhere by myself.  I now kind of go around like I own the clinic.  Being around people no longer bothers me as much as it once did.  This is a good feeling, and I hope it continues.   After getting home tonight, I tried calling the person who I became friends with during my Anxiety Group.  To my amazement, my call went through and she answered the phone.  One of her friends was with her, but we still managed to have a telephone conversation of sorts.  We are going to keep in touch, and she has asked me to send her some more images of angels from the Internet.  I said that I would try to do that.   I feel as though something new, and good, is happening with my life.  Whatever it is, it has been missing for far too long.   Quotes for Happiness:   “All I ask for is an opportunity to prove that money doesn't buy happiness.” Anonymous