I've been so busy up to my eye balls with med appts at the VA. Been also very busy with MAtt. We have been spending tons of time together just working on us and better communication. Poor Matthew has been by my side thru all the last appts, he is so sick of the VA now. He told me he hates being there now, and I laughed and said "how do you think I feel? when I'm not with you i'm most of the time at the VA!" and I told him about how out side of my docs i have no life other than him. he said he is in the same boat with the marine corps, and that out side of the military i'm all he got as well. he had a few days off this week since they had him working every weekend for so long now. So we spent every minute together. I think we are improving a lot because our communication has been much better. I also told him about how he tends to push me away and all I want to do is help. Maybe I wasn't infantry but I am familiar with how the Corps messes with you and the games they play. I think he finally got the picture about when I get so frustrated and why. And after all this time we spent together, I know things will only get better. I am so greatful for the friends I have here at DS! You all have been so sweet and supportive! I coouldn't ask for more! God bless you all!
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Hey Babes,
It\'s good to hear from you. I\'m with you about the VA as are most people who have anything to do with them. I wonder why they are so crappy? My dad was in the Navy for 23 years and I was born in a hospital in Tokoyo, Japan on Peach Blosoom Day! I\'m surprised I came out ok (relatively speaking.) My older sister, Marty, got spinal meningitis with blood poisioning the day before I was born. She suddenly went into convultions. My poor mom and dad. Mom was busy in labor with me, and dad was going out of his mind while Marty(age 2) was fighting for her life , an I was being born. Marty was very fortunate not to end up brain damaged or with other crippling problems.
Having been a naval brat, I remember about having to go to the naval doctors when I was sick. One time I had a bad cough and fever. Mom took me several times, and all they did was prescribe stronger and stronger cough syrups, but no antibiotics. Finally, I just collapsed one day.So it was back to the hugh waiting room where you took a number and waited, and waited for hours. We got there as soon as they opened that a.m. and at lunch time, they closed down until lunch. Then you went back at 2:00 p.m. to wait some more. Finally when I saw the doctor, he thought I had TB, so they did a TB test and it was negative.I had a fever of 106. Duh! Then it occured to him that a X-ray just might be in order. Turns out I had walking pneumonia in both lungs. He advised my mom that I should be in the hospital for IV\'s, etc.,but that the care I would get from her at home would be much better! So, he gave me a bicillin shot then and I had to return everyday after that for a penicillin shot for the next week. I will never forget all the waiting, especially when you\"re 8 yrs. old and so sick you can\'t even feed yourself or walk. I missed the entire summer(we lived one street over from the beach) and was bed ridden for 4 months. I even had to start school late.
So having grown up a military brat, I completely understand what being in the military is like. At least my dad was an officer so we got some nice perks along the way.
I was 13 yrs. old before I stepped foot in a grocery store rather than the commisery.But the biggest memories I had were when he\'d suddenly get orders to go offshore and would be gone for 18-20 months at a time. I grew up with a dad I imagined. As soon as he left, everything in the house would fall apart, the TV, a hurricane would come, our pipes froze, the fridge broke,etc. It was the pits.
Sorry about that. I can really get off on tangents sometimes. It has something to do with my being bipolar.You might have to learn to speed read through all this crap.
Back to Matt. Good news! You are speaking up and getting the BIG issues worked out before marriage. This is so vital. Otherwise you\'ll end up doing a dance so to speak, with each one of you acting and reacting in similair patterns, going in circles, but not getting anything solved. To me, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different results.
I have had a bad habit(no longer) of making excuses for other peoples\' rotten behavior. For example: Charlie might yell at me for something I didn\'t even do, and I\'ll think well, he wouldn\'t have done that if he wasn\'t tired or if he wasn\'t in pain, or if he wasn\'t worried about his cancer, etc. ad nauseaum. Charlie doesn\'t yell at me, so that was just an example.
Had a bad attack of IBS today, so I\'m feeling all bloated up, and tomorrow we are leaving for Austin, TX. I\'m not really excited about going(I have some issued with my dauther-in-law Missy that I wrote about earlier on in my journal.) Remember you suggested she be put through basic training? Well, I love the idea! I just don\'t understand why she has so many friends and is always busy with social engagements? I think she\'s a good actress around other people...especially if they have money or prestige or power. They\'re good friends with some senator and his wife whom I met at her wedding. As a result she & Russ got invited to the Presidential Ball. Wow!
Did I tell you she takes tons of pictures and has quite a few framed and hanging on the walls? Last time we were there, I noticed there wasn\'t one picture of Charlie and I. So I mentioned it to Charlie, and he jokingly brought it up to them. She said she get one put up ASAP. That\'s so typical of her. Of course the senator and his wife were on the wall.
Well, brain death has occured. Must go pack. Ugh.
Love & hugs,
Elaine
I hear you. Appointments take up such a huge chunk of time. That\'s why its so nice when you find a dr office with pleasant staff, feels more like you\'re visiting a friend. At least that\'s what I try to tell myself! LOL!
I am happy to hear things are moving along a positive note for you and Matt. It really does sound like he is being more supportive now. He can finally have a taste of what you go through while he is in attendance at the VA hospital with you, the reality of it. I\'m crossing my fingers that everything continues to go well between you!