My thoughts...I have certain values which I try to live by:Honesty.   Some people will tell you that the truth hurts.  Well, that may be true, but a lie hurts more.  It may smooth things over for a while, but when the truth is discovered after a lie, it hurts so much more.  If you are honest from the beginning, forgiveness is easier for the other person.  An example of this is the 'cheating spouse' (or partner, whichever the case may be).  A man runs into his former girlfriend while at a friends house.  They get to talking about the past, and they end up kissing at some point.  After a little while, things begin to 'heat up'.  One of them stops it, saying how wrong it is to do what they're doing.  The man goes home, and his wife is sleeping in their bed.  She wakes up as he is getting undressed, and looks at the clock.  It's late, and she asks where he's been.  He gives a short answer, and she believes him because she has trust in him.  A few minutes later, just as she is about to fall back to sleep, he begins to tell her what happened.  She's deeply hurt, and wonders how he can love her and still do something like that.  She's angry with him, and her heart is breaking, but she stays with him.  Why?  Because she realizes that he COULD have lied to her and never said a word about it.  If he HAD lied, and kept it a secret, what if she had found out later on?  It would have hurt so much more, all because he lied to her about it.  Sure, she felt pain and heartache when he told her what happened.  The truth DOES hurt sometimes, but the truth being revealed after a lie was told is far worse.   It is at that point when trust is broken.Listening.   There are different types of 'listening'.  The type I'm talking about is when you stop what you're doing, and you pay close attention to what's around you.  (The other kind of 'listening' is what you are supposed to do when you're mother is repremaning you- "You better listen to me, or you'll be sorry!" But, I'm not getting into that right now...)  Sometimes, when the world seems crazy, I have to stop and listen.  I have to close my eyes, and let my ears tell me what's going on.  I take it all in.  Give it try- there's more going on than you think!  If you just take a minute to listen, and think about all that is going on, you'll find that you're missing out on some great stuff!  It's amazing what we all get used to hearing, and how we tune out a lot of things.  You don't notice the humming of your computer, do you?  You don't notice the sounds of the person typing in the cubicle next to you.  You don't notice the birds singing or the breeze rustling the leaves on the trees.  Not many people do.  Can you remember the last time you heard a bird chirping in the distance?  Has it been so long that you can't recall?  They sing every day.  You just don't notice it.  The old saying, "Stop and smell the roses" could also apply to other senses, such as hearing.  Stop and listen for the birds, they sing a beautiful song, you just have to stop and listen for it.  You'll notice that they 'talk' to each other.  Back and forth they chatter, always something to be said between them.  Don't tune the world out, there's so much beauty that you're missing out on!Smiling.  A smile goes a LOOOOOOONG way.  Smile at the stranger who is walking their dog down the street.  You don't have to have a reason to do it.  Just do it anyway.  It'll make their day!  Anger spreads easily, but so does friendliness and happiness.  The cashier at the grocery store may be having a tough time at home, you never know.  But, smile at her, and it will probably lift her spirit.  It feels so good to make other's happy- try it for a change, then you will see how wonderful it feels!Giving.  This is very important to me.  I would rather give something to someone else than spend money on myself.  It's the feeling that I made someone else happy that satisfies me.  I love to give things to people, and see the happiness in their eyes.  People have asked me what I want for my birthday or Christmas, but I never know what to say.  I don't want anything, except to be able to give to someone else.  I often daydream about winning millions from the lottery, and what I would spend the money on.  I can never think of what I would buy for myself, but I have a whole list of things I would buy for others.  I don't have to 'buy' anyone's love- I just love to make people happy.  I give my time to those who need me.  I don't want anything in return.  That's what giving is all about.  Give of yourself, and don't stop and think about what's in it for you.  That would be selfish.Acceptance.  No one is perfect, and we all have our own beliefs, backrounds, and situations.  It doesn't matter if someone is Christian, Catholic, Wiccan, Lutheran, Muslim, Jewish, or if they do not have a religion.  They don't have to believe in the same god as you, or that there is a higher power.  It doesn't matter if someone is Spanish, white, black, Asian, or any other race different from your own.  It doesn't matter if a person is gay or straight.  It doesn't matter if they live differently than you do.  We all may be different, but we are all still the same.  We all have feelings, thoughts, and ideas.  We all feel pain, we all feel hunger, we all feel sadness, and we all feel joy.  Wars are fought over religion, but why?  Who is to say which religion is the correct one?  Does it REALLY matter?  Let them believe what they want to believe.  Don't get angry at someone else because they don't agree 100% with you.  They're entitled to their opinions, just as you are entitled to yours.  Who cares if a black man and a white woman love each other?  Isn't love and happiness what matters?  Doesn't that matter MORE than what color their skin is?  Does it really make a difference in your life if a man is attracted to another man?  So long as they are happy, what do you care?  What it all comes down to is love.  Nothing else matters.  People whisper behind other people's backs, but why?  Is it anyone's business what someone does with their own life?  People are hurt by the cruel words of others.  And, it seems to be that everyone is quick to judge others, but when someone does it to them, they're so offended, as if they hadn't done it to someone else before.  You don't have to agree with everyone, but try to accept that we are all different, and we are all the same.~Melinda G.