I am getting so tired and it is only early afternoon. Ever since I had that procedure done yesterday and started taking that medication a couple weeks ago, I have been really tired.
The procedure went really badly. I was awake while they set me and everything up. Everyone (3 Men and 2 women)was rushing around. I felt really uncomfortable. I mean the doctor was doing everything to protect my privacy like holding my gown closed when they made me stand up with out my robe.
But then they had me lie down on the table and I felt these thick straps around my legs. One nurse grabbed my left hand and started to pull it down and I was fighting. I turned to the other nurse and started crying please I don't like this I can't do it. She told the other nurse that they don't we need to do that as long as I promised not to touch anything. I thought they were just going to do this until they put in the anti anxiety drugs, but no.
After the surgery I came out crying very hard and talking about the rape and those men strapping me down. They had given me versed which makes you forget. I think I was remembering what I was saying at the beginning of the procedure as though I was remembered it now.
They got the doctor for me because I was so upset about what happened and I wanted to talk to him. He said, at first I had wanted to help and show them where the pain was and then I touched the sterile field so they had to start all over. I became combative when the were trying to do this. So basically it was a bad day.
The top of my leg felt numb down until about 2 inches below my knee. But I was also having pain last night. I couldn't get to sleep last night because I couldn't get comfortable. Maybe that is why I am so tired today. I have a feeling we are going to be doing this again. He spoke about trying to do it will I was awake, but after what he was telling me, I don't think that was a good idea at all.
It is really funny because I feel like this one piece of my pain is very low. But now I feel this pain as if it were more far reaching than I thought, because so much more hurts than before. I feel like the doctor will call me a liar. But he was so nice. Well, I have like ten days to find out. Or I could his assistant, she is very nice.
I don't know what to do. I know many times I have said that here that I just want to feel better and I feel like this was my last best hope. I don't want another doctor to leave me. And then to have rape issues come out like that and I feel LIKE I HAVE NO ONE TO TALK TO NOW. And this is when I need some one.
I think I need some chocolate.
Kristen
The procedure went really badly. I was awake while they set me and everything up. Everyone (3 Men and 2 women)was rushing around. I felt really uncomfortable. I mean the doctor was doing everything to protect my privacy like holding my gown closed when they made me stand up with out my robe.
But then they had me lie down on the table and I felt these thick straps around my legs. One nurse grabbed my left hand and started to pull it down and I was fighting. I turned to the other nurse and started crying please I don't like this I can't do it. She told the other nurse that they don't we need to do that as long as I promised not to touch anything. I thought they were just going to do this until they put in the anti anxiety drugs, but no.
After the surgery I came out crying very hard and talking about the rape and those men strapping me down. They had given me versed which makes you forget. I think I was remembering what I was saying at the beginning of the procedure as though I was remembered it now.
They got the doctor for me because I was so upset about what happened and I wanted to talk to him. He said, at first I had wanted to help and show them where the pain was and then I touched the sterile field so they had to start all over. I became combative when the were trying to do this. So basically it was a bad day.
The top of my leg felt numb down until about 2 inches below my knee. But I was also having pain last night. I couldn't get to sleep last night because I couldn't get comfortable. Maybe that is why I am so tired today. I have a feeling we are going to be doing this again. He spoke about trying to do it will I was awake, but after what he was telling me, I don't think that was a good idea at all.
It is really funny because I feel like this one piece of my pain is very low. But now I feel this pain as if it were more far reaching than I thought, because so much more hurts than before. I feel like the doctor will call me a liar. But he was so nice. Well, I have like ten days to find out. Or I could his assistant, she is very nice.
I don't know what to do. I know many times I have said that here that I just want to feel better and I feel like this was my last best hope. I don't want another doctor to leave me. And then to have rape issues come out like that and I feel LIKE I HAVE NO ONE TO TALK TO NOW. And this is when I need some one.
I think I need some chocolate.
Kristen
Replies
chocolate rocks...you have plenty of people here who you can talk to, hon.
You always have us to talk about. I am sorry it went so badly. When you wrote about the straps, I cringed for you. I wish I could help more.