Well, I am all dressed and ready and scared as hell. one part of me says this guys really cares about me and would not abandon me, but there is another part of me that is afraid he just feels he can't help me.

My plan is to tell him what it is I like about him so that he will know I appreciate him. I don't want a doctor who says he knows it all and then does nothing. I don't want a doctor who has no idea what he is doing and won't tell me. I want him. He tells me he is not sure, but he tries to find the answer for me. He talks to other doctors, goes to conventions and reads up on the internet and such. That is the kind of doctor I was working for me.

There is also that good stuff about how he seems able to take care of my rape situation during exams.

I don't want him to dump me to find another doctor. I will see anyone else for a second opinion, but I don't want to be dumped.

I was going to write this all down because I thought I would never be able to get it out, but we will just have to see what happens.

I did not cut last night. I listened to music and talk to a friend. You know who you are.

Well, I have to get my socks and shoes on and drive over. The weather is still bad here so I guess I should leave extra time.