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Hey Everyone:
I really have no idea what I want or need to say here so this could end up being just aimless nattering.
I've doubted if there's too many people in my lifes circle that can understand Callie & me. I know my family doesn't really. I've got one soul friend/sister here in my city that totally comprehends & one other person too so thats something right. I think thru all the miles here on DS I can luck out & have people that really can get it. How can I ever express to all of you what that can mean to me.
The words I'm entering here might not make sense to some but I feel I need to get it out if not for therapy for myself I guess.
I was at my reflexologist the day after Callie passed so I was not in the best frame of being. She has a very strong 6th sense & could tell that my emotions were way off the radar screen as far as me being at the end of the line. At one point I was describing Callie's personality traits & her way of being & without any time for thought or pondering she looked at me & said "Callie was an extension of you & what you want & strive to be in life". "You never were able to have children so when the Lord had Callie he could see that she was the other half of you & you two were brought together." It kind of really stopped me short & yet the more I reviewed this I could not deny that the statement is so very true. I've lost other pets over most of my adult life & I can 200% say none have affected me this way. I truly do feel like I've had half of me cut off & as the tears flow while I type this I can so almost physically feel her on the back of my shoulders. Callie, Callie, Callie, my dear precious little munchkin. Her spirit just does not want to leave me yet, doesn't much make sense does it. Does anyone want to call the nut house & have me locked away for a bit. I really wish I could just turn life off for a bit.
OK, I'm babbling here aren't I. Lets try & change the subject. Hubby had his reg check in at the cancer clinic. All the way there I focused on handing it up to God & praying for his intervention at this time. We did get good news - his PSA was way down to 0.2 & all things seems stable. He still will be going for a few more hormone injection treatments though. We both felt that we now want to look for some way to thank our Lord for his gift & I will look for the opportunity to do this. One never knows when on any given day a chance to pay love & blessings forward may come up.
We still have some very nice weather here & it's really too bad that it's inevitably going to get cooler. We have a tomato plant that is just abt 7 ft tall. It's still flowering & my husband says that it it could it could maybe go far into winter which is impossible in our climate but I so almost hate to see the weather changing & this poor tomato on steroids I think will have to come to tne end of it's days. I just realized I shd take a photo & post it on here so you folks can check this guy out.
I thought I had way more to say but words just escape me right now so I'll quit while I'm ahead.
I really have no idea what I want or need to say here so this could end up being just aimless nattering.
I've doubted if there's too many people in my lifes circle that can understand Callie & me. I know my family doesn't really. I've got one soul friend/sister here in my city that totally comprehends & one other person too so thats something right. I think thru all the miles here on DS I can luck out & have people that really can get it. How can I ever express to all of you what that can mean to me.
The words I'm entering here might not make sense to some but I feel I need to get it out if not for therapy for myself I guess.
I was at my reflexologist the day after Callie passed so I was not in the best frame of being. She has a very strong 6th sense & could tell that my emotions were way off the radar screen as far as me being at the end of the line. At one point I was describing Callie's personality traits & her way of being & without any time for thought or pondering she looked at me & said "Callie was an extension of you & what you want & strive to be in life". "You never were able to have children so when the Lord had Callie he could see that she was the other half of you & you two were brought together." It kind of really stopped me short & yet the more I reviewed this I could not deny that the statement is so very true. I've lost other pets over most of my adult life & I can 200% say none have affected me this way. I truly do feel like I've had half of me cut off & as the tears flow while I type this I can so almost physically feel her on the back of my shoulders. Callie, Callie, Callie, my dear precious little munchkin. Her spirit just does not want to leave me yet, doesn't much make sense does it. Does anyone want to call the nut house & have me locked away for a bit. I really wish I could just turn life off for a bit.
OK, I'm babbling here aren't I. Lets try & change the subject. Hubby had his reg check in at the cancer clinic. All the way there I focused on handing it up to God & praying for his intervention at this time. We did get good news - his PSA was way down to 0.2 & all things seems stable. He still will be going for a few more hormone injection treatments though. We both felt that we now want to look for some way to thank our Lord for his gift & I will look for the opportunity to do this. One never knows when on any given day a chance to pay love & blessings forward may come up.
We still have some very nice weather here & it's really too bad that it's inevitably going to get cooler. We have a tomato plant that is just abt 7 ft tall. It's still flowering & my husband says that it it could it could maybe go far into winter which is impossible in our climate but I so almost hate to see the weather changing & this poor tomato on steroids I think will have to come to tne end of it's days. I just realized I shd take a photo & post it on here so you folks can check this guy out.
I thought I had way more to say but words just escape me right now so I'll quit while I'm ahead.
Replies
I wish I had some encouragement for you about Callie. All that comes to mind is that maybe God will send her spirit back to you in the form of another pet. I have this hunch that he does that sometimes. Maybe that is crazy, I don\'t know. I believe God is going to send you some kind of blessing to help you through this time. I am so sorry that you are going through it all the same.
Give yourself a wide berth of time and patience and be gentle with yourself OK?
Soooooo happy to hear that hubby got good news PTL! I pray for both of you everyday and am happy for the blessings for you both.
Our tomato plants that are still going are yielding sour fruit now. Bummer. It took so long to get fruit and after a short while it was bitter. We had some giant plants when we lived near DC and it made me feel so blessed. We had tomatoes in every room of our home hanging out, we had so many haha.
Praying for heaping blessings for you right now!
Did I ever tell you about my kitty named Delilah? If not, I felt the same way you did about Callie. I always felt like our souls were dancing! That may seem odd, but that was the only description I can think of that best describes how I felt about her. We were soul mates. Callie will always be in your heart and maybe mechellebelle is right about the fact that maybe her soul will return to you in another form. Regardless, I believe we will once again see those who we have lost in this life.
Glad to hear about hubby\'s good news.
May God wrap his precious arms around you and comfort you.
I just feel one day you will walk inside that cat shelter and fall in love with another little munckin. God will know when the time is right. Till then let Callie
s spirit be with you. I wish I could come there and talk with you but I am always a phone call away. Any time. Love, Frieda
I believe that our Rusty and Spinners spirits are with us through Scooter as he does little things that our old boys RIP did.....maybe I am looking for signs but there is comfort in this. I understand your feelings as we chose not to have human babies only furry ones. Love hugs and support always. Xxooo
Wherever a beautiful soul has been there is a trail of beautiful memories. I believe Callies spirit will remain to help you through your grieving, she will be with you your entire life, in your heart.