Sad...
It seems like everywhere I turn, everywhere I go and everyone I talk to, everybody has what I want! Lately, I have felt so alone in this game (with the exception of all of you wonderful women!). In my family, at my job, among my circle of friends, EVERYONE has children, but US! My heart ached when my pg friend at work asked how my holiday was, then she said "did you see your nieces and nephews?" I love all of them dearly, but, will I ever get to talk about a holiday with my own kids? Will people always discreetly wonderif she'll ever have children? I feel like most people that know us, know that we would love to be parents, but may not know why we're not. I sense that there's this nagging question inside of them just wanting to ask us when? After nearly 10 years of marriage, logic has to tell you that maybe, just maybe, something's not right. I don't volunteer our IF details to many, only those who have been there (few), or those that I know genuinely care. For most, I put on a facade while dying on the inside. My heart hurts. I wish I could say we had a great Christmas, but truth be known, it was quite difficult. It was sad to face yet another holiday without news to share with our family; sad to not have our children's gifts to buy and wrap; sad to see another year come to a close without the sounds of pitter patter running through the house. Here's hoping 2009 will be OUR year! We could use some good news for a change...
Replies
Maybe I could cut and paste this into my journal. I feel the same way! Exactly. I hope, hope, hope that 2009 is the year! Big hugs.
I\'m sorry you\'re hurting. I agree, I\'m trying even to convince myself that Christmas was great, but there\'s still a void that wasn\'t filled this year.
I know the words I am sorry don\'t really help. Although I cannot say I know how you feel exactly, I definitely have felt those feelings many times. I pray that 2009 is your year and your dreams come true! XXX
Sweetie, I am so sorry, I know exactly how you feel. I smiled and faked my way through, but Christmas was brutal. There\'s nothing as horrible as an aching heart. If there was a shortcut around your pain I\'d gladly give it to you, but alas, nothing but time will heal your grief. I hope that 2009 brings you sunshine, happiness and that pitter patter you wish for so much. Many hugs, Wendy
I\'m so sorry about all of this sadness. I know it doesn\'t really help but I echo your sentiments exactly. Well, except we told everyone around us about our IVFs but sometimes that just makes it worse. The holidays just tend to amplify the sadness and emptiness all feel. I hope that 2009 brings good news for all of us...if I don\'t mind saying so myself, I feel we ladies deserve to be moms more than anyone else! Big hugs to you, you\'re NOT alone.
2009 will be our year!! No if ands or buts!! We have been through enough pain..now it is time for a whole lot of happiness. :)
My heart goes out to you as I know just how you feel. Stay strong and positive and I hope and pray that 2009 will be the best year ever!
I\'m sorry you feel like this...I totally relate...I\'ve been dealing with the same battle for some time now. I just know that one day all this struggle will make sense and you will have the baby you desire. Stay strong and positive girly!!!