4 months today

It's 4 months and I still feel so sad and lonely.  I keep hearing "it gets easier" but I haven't seen that yet.  I realized again today how much my husband and I connected on a daily basis.  He was at work before me so he would call first to "just check in".  Then I would call when the kids got home to "just check in".  Then we'd have dinner or go out and just be together then off to bed ... and do this again and again for 32 years.  We were so lucky.  As sad as I feel I'm so glad I had him and his love.  Randy really loved me, no matter what.  He was my best friend.  I would go to him before anyone else.  He was my first thought.  Now he's still my first thought, all day thought and last thought of the day.  He's on my mind all the time, I miss him so much.