Feeling sad...
It was three weeks ago today that my ex-husband and I said goodbye to my son. He pleaded to a 15 yr sentence rather than face life in prison.
It has been a really hard transition for me. My son lived with me and he was here for me when I was sad, or happy or just being here in general.
This is the first time in 58 years that I have been totally alone. I hate it. I feel sad and lonely. Everyone tells me to keep busy..Im unemployed, so I don't even have that. I don't have any family here, my kids live out of state and moving is out of the question at this point.
I just need to let time heal, but it is hard. I talk to him once a week and get to see him every other week, (his dad and I share his visit days) They are only for 1/2 hour, and by a phone, and I don't want to share that with anyone at this point. My son sounds good, and that helps a bit..but
I have church, which is a comfort, but its still not helping my sadness.
I just wanted to write this down, and hopefully it will get easier...
It has been a really hard transition for me. My son lived with me and he was here for me when I was sad, or happy or just being here in general.
This is the first time in 58 years that I have been totally alone. I hate it. I feel sad and lonely. Everyone tells me to keep busy..Im unemployed, so I don't even have that. I don't have any family here, my kids live out of state and moving is out of the question at this point.
I just need to let time heal, but it is hard. I talk to him once a week and get to see him every other week, (his dad and I share his visit days) They are only for 1/2 hour, and by a phone, and I don't want to share that with anyone at this point. My son sounds good, and that helps a bit..but
I have church, which is a comfort, but its still not helping my sadness.
I just wanted to write this down, and hopefully it will get easier...
Replies
I feel for you! My son\'s on the run from facing about 12 years. He skipped his sentencing 5 months ago on the 14th. I pretty much alone too. He lived with me for awhile. I realize how dependent I was on him financially. I\'ve been raising his daughter daughter since she was 2 and a half years old. She\'s 12 1/2 now. Her mother moved back into town almost a year ago after living out of state for 9 years. And now my granddaughter wants to be with her most of the time. She only saw her twice in those 9 years. So not only is my son gone from my life but now his daughter is starting to want to be with her mom. It breaks my heart!
I\'m not working either. I\'m on disability so I understand that to but I have a daughter too and I babysit her kids 3 days and nights a week. My son also has two boys.
I go to church too. My Faith is what keeps me glued together and what puts me back together when I fall apart!
I find it very helpful to be in this group and to journal. I\'m sorry you are going through all that you are going through! We all can try to get through our heartache together.
Hugs and prayers coming your way!
Thanks for writing..I am really sorry about your son. I can\'t imagine what you are going through..but faith is good. I am praying for us both. Right now its all I have and I know the Lord is watching out over us both.