I came home yesterday afternoon from my daughter's water polo game which was an hour and a half from where we live. After the game my daughter called my sbtx on her cell and told her about the game. That brought up massive emotions within me as my sbtx was so involved in my daughters polo the last three years. I cried on the way home in the car. I get home to a phone message from a credit card company. They want to talk to my wife about recent activity in her account. She has been on a crazy spending spree the last month or so. My name is not on the card and we are legally seperated but damn, she is out there. There was a returned check thing from the bank on our checking account that has been shut down and the kicker is that her lawyer sent me a letter about a mediation session in court to discuss the details of the custodial timeshare. The kids are four months away from 18 and have chosen not to spend time with their mom, because they are mad at her and she is crazy at the moment. It felt overwhelming to me. I called her and left a message about these things and she texted me back that is was no big deal. I am trying to get honest and real and face the fact that divorce is the only option. The kids wanted to finish their time here in their house but the house will be sold in the divorce, and it looks like my wife will shortly be needing her share of the profits. The whole thing is sad. It didn't have to go this way. But it is this way. That is just the fact.
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I hesitate saying what I want to say because I don\'t know your wife, or really you for that matter, but I feel that your wife and my husband are so damn selfish. Why would your wife want to disrupt your children\'s life when they are 18 and only have a few months to go, why make them move out of the house that they are used to. As far as my husband why does he want to be in the middle of his girlfriends children (3 and 5), have them go back and forth to different homes, not have a mom and dad together. For what? for their own selfishness. As far as the money is concerned, I hear you on that one too. My husband got a credit card and has not paid a dime on it, he took out a 500 loan for some reason, who knows? he doesn\'t pay the cell phone, doesn\'t pay the money he owes me. I can\'t figure him out. Where did the responsible adult go that I married? Where did the responsible adult go that you married? T, they have lost their way in life, and I tried to help him pick up the pieces and come home and live a decent life, but he chose not to and now look at him, same as your wife. I think something comes over them and they just don\'t have feelings anymore. Sad, but we must continue on, and do what is best. I give you alot of credit, you are holding up and you are taking care of business, I admire you!
my stbx has a lot of financial issues and i know that this is really hard. you never know what is going to come along. i think it is great that you are being responsible and putting your children first. they are the most important and truly innocent in this whole terrible situation. best.
I know what you mean about how it didn\'t have to go this way and yet it did anyway. It sounds to me like you\'re going to do ok even though you don\'t feel like it at the moment. You seem like a great dad and in touch with your feelings. You\'re going to get through this and be a better person for it.
The question that arises is this: are drugs involved? Erratic behavior is sometimes bolstered by alcohol and substances that cause the strange behavior we read about here on DS. Are drugs involved?
Mo...
I am sorry that your stbx has chosen to throw everyones life into a turmoil like this. That is selfish and sad.
Most of us are dealing with the aftermath of selfish partners...but don\'t have children trying to finish their senior year of highschool...that is cruel.
I hope that your house is like most of the other homes in California, and just sits on the market for a long while. Mine is projected to sit for about a year and a half. Oh Well...not much market right now...