Too bad I didn't have time this morning to write my journal entry. it would have been much more cheerful. I had a funny Reece story to tell but it will have to wait. Don't write about work much but it's only Tuesday and it's already been a week. I've lost 3 patients and I am going to loose at least 2 more before the week is over. A couple of them have been particularly rough. Went to see one of my long-time patients today( about 1 yr). Not doing well at all and getting confused. Told me that he couldn't get his thoughts together. Ex Military guy. He and I have had a joking kind of relationship. he calls me 'the boss". He complains to me about different things and I tell him that I will take care of it..I have his back. Today he was scared and confused and before I left he asked me if I had his back. I assured him that I did. Then he asked me if I will come to his funeral. I assured him that I would. Then I left his house and cried. Just for a few minutes. Then on to the next patient. Ex called today to talk to me about a movie that Connor wants. An old Western and since I don't know anything about them he wanted to tell me that it is not one that he should watch. Thats fine. Then he wanted to talk about Connors daycare and why they don't feed him lunch. What kind of daycare is it?? NOT a traditional daycare. it is Karate studio and it is set up more like a daycamp so I have to send his lunch. He is having a great time there. Ex told me that for "all that money" they could at least feed them lunch. SO wanted to give him a verbal ass kicking. He had no suggestions about daycare for the summer ( I gave him the opportunity to voice an opinion). He is not paying for it. He is not packing Connor's lunch every morning. He is not responsible for taking him there every morning with whatever he needs for the activity of the day. He doesn't have to pick him up, bring him home and take care of him. SO..what difference does it make to him??? I didn't say that to him. I just told him that "traditional daycare" no longer meets Connors needs and as long as he is having a good summer..I don't mind packing his lunch. At some point in my emotionally trying day..I started to feel a bit overwhelmed. Everyone has days that you just want to be able to come home and have someone who is willing to take over..even take care of you. I don't need that often. I didn't have it even when my ex was here. That is going to be my #1 requirement for next time.Still able to find some bright spots in my day. Today is hard but life is still good. I'll try to remember the funny Reece story tommorrow.
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Che - totally understand the feelings of having someone to take care of you when you have a bad day. Heck when you have a good day it would be nice to have someone there to make you feel loved, special and appreciated. Like you - I didn\'t have that when with my stbx. Here\'s to finding that frog (oops I mean great, prince of a guy) that can be caring and giving too! : )
What really sucks is there are men out here that use to do those types of things for their wives and were never appriciated for it. I know there are women out their that DO appriciate it...just that mine never did. Nothing better than taking care of and \"protecting\" someone you care about.
Try and remember the story tonight, even if you don\'t get a chance to write it down, I think it will bring a smile to your face. Too bad you don\'t live closer, I would take the boys and let you at least have some rest. They would have a blast here with my kids and since there is always a kid or two or five over most of the time, it wouldn\'t be a big deal. Though I would feed them, the others, I usually send home.
I feel for you. That is a rough day and I could just see the guy saying those things to you. I could picture him being scared and lost. He needs someone to have his back. Your very special and strong to do what you do. Put the boys to bed, light up some candles and soak in an nice hot bath.
Agree with Tim........we all need time to decompress and relax. Your kids are great..........and agree with you as boys/girls mature, they need different interaction for summer care depending on what \"fits their needs\"..........making lunch is a small price to pay, for having a good program........
I was thinking while reading what you wanted to verbally kick his A** with and just felt like you should have done it. Good way to start an argument, besides you don\'t have to justify your decisions to him. He had his chance before..
That sounds like such a difficult job. You are a very strong person.. Hope you have a better day tomorrow.
Very rough day. Yes, we all need someone to take care of us once in a while. I didn\'t get it in my marriage either. Next time around, if there is one.