Nightmares!!!
A great big long one last night. The gf was in it. We were at some sort of function and were actually communicating with each other. It was bad. In my nightmare Reece saw the gf and told me that she was fat and wore too much makeup. That was a little bit funny.
My kids have not met the gf and they can't, per our divorce agreement, as long as she is still married. I don't know what world my ex is living in but in MY world dads are not supposed to have gf's that are married to someone else. She is still far from being divorced and her divorce has reached a new level of ugliness. I don't know what is going on with her and my ex but I know that they have cooled things off because of her divorce and her trying to get custody of her son. It could take another year. I am hoping that the ex won't have that kind of staying power and that as she gets deeper in debt..a big loss on her house and a $30+ thousand dollar divorce he will get scared off.
I am spending all of this time trying to get over this stuff. Whenever she enters the picture with my kids I feel like I will have to go through it all over again. I might be a lifetime member on DS.
I have tried to look at her objectively. I have a good friend who once had an affair with a married man. She is not a horrible person.. but I now know too much about the gf to ever be able to feel that way about her. She is a horror..that I don't want my children to ever have to be around. So..here's hoping for the longest divorce in history and my ex meeting someone else. I'll have to drink to that with coffee..can't have wine at 8am on a Sunday morning!!
On a lighter note..Reece made up a poem for me last night..Roses are red..Violets are blue..there is nothing in Heaven as beautiful as you. THEN he said..haha just kidding..BUT.. I do love you.
I love him too.
A great big long one last night. The gf was in it. We were at some sort of function and were actually communicating with each other. It was bad. In my nightmare Reece saw the gf and told me that she was fat and wore too much makeup. That was a little bit funny.
My kids have not met the gf and they can't, per our divorce agreement, as long as she is still married. I don't know what world my ex is living in but in MY world dads are not supposed to have gf's that are married to someone else. She is still far from being divorced and her divorce has reached a new level of ugliness. I don't know what is going on with her and my ex but I know that they have cooled things off because of her divorce and her trying to get custody of her son. It could take another year. I am hoping that the ex won't have that kind of staying power and that as she gets deeper in debt..a big loss on her house and a $30+ thousand dollar divorce he will get scared off.
I am spending all of this time trying to get over this stuff. Whenever she enters the picture with my kids I feel like I will have to go through it all over again. I might be a lifetime member on DS.
I have tried to look at her objectively. I have a good friend who once had an affair with a married man. She is not a horrible person.. but I now know too much about the gf to ever be able to feel that way about her. She is a horror..that I don't want my children to ever have to be around. So..here's hoping for the longest divorce in history and my ex meeting someone else. I'll have to drink to that with coffee..can't have wine at 8am on a Sunday morning!!
On a lighter note..Reece made up a poem for me last night..Roses are red..Violets are blue..there is nothing in Heaven as beautiful as you. THEN he said..haha just kidding..BUT.. I do love you.
I love him too.
Replies
What a crazy place to be... but I understand. Once we start to get over our ex, it\'s almost like we\'d like to play matchmaker for them just so our kids get a decent person in their life, because we sure don\'t trust our ex to make the right choice :)
I don\'t often point out the positives of what my wife is doing, but as far as I can tell, I don\'t think she is bring any of her new friends around the kids... of course, that\'s why I have the kids so much! But I\'ll take that any day. Works out better for everyone.
By the way, my guess is that Reece meant the poem as written... boys all too often get messages early on in life about how wrong it is for them to express such things. Either way, it\'s nice to end the day with a laugh.
You raise a good point about worrying about your kids and the influence of that woman on them. I\'m sure the divorce will take a while, I\'m positive as all the realities of the situation hit your ex, he\'s hitting the high-water. I mean what could it be about her that he is hanging on to. Sounds to me like the financial situation alone would scare the s&&t out of him!
I have probably 2 things I\'m pondering about my stbx\'s GF and my daughter and they will go into the separation/divorce agreement:
1) She doesn\'t stay with my daughter alone (wtihout dad) that means if it\'s dad\'s weekend to have my daughter and he has a band gig (she doesn\'t get to babysit or be alone with my daughter).
2) No religious influence what so ever! I have not posted at all the religious aspect of my stbx\'s GF and won\'t and I\'m not prejudice in anyway when it comes to religion I believe in almost all of them except this woman\'s.
Nice poem for a wonderful mother!
It is in my divorce papers that the gf..even when she can be around them..can never be ALONE with them. My ex is hanging on because he threw his whole life away for this chick. he has nothing else!!
Che, you CAN have wine at 8:00am on Sunday - it\'s called being Catholic!
And I\'m thinking there should be some sort of \"gold\" status for lifetime DS members...maybe if they ever develop their own chat client and chat rooms we can have exclusive use of it.
As for the ex\'s situation - egads, what a mess! Sounds like it will take a long time to unravel, with time being on your side.
Remember, all this GROWTH needs FERTILIZER! lol - looks like your ex\'s gf has plenty of which to offer.
I love the poem, what a great kid.
Those are nightmares. I don\'t ever want to meet whom ever my stbx is with. At least not anytime soon. Your one smart cookie to put that in the divorce settlement agreement. I\'m with you, no one, mother or father should be dating someone else who\'s still married.
BluesPlayer..sounds like reason enough to convert to me..lol AND..yes..the gf has plently of fertilizer to feed my growth.. and then some..
your son is so sweeeeeeeeet! that sure will make your day.