The Peanut Butter Debate...
Thanks for the advise everyone. I'm going to leave it alone. Not going to say anything to him and not going grocery shoping for him. I told him in the beginning of all of this that I would never interfere with him having a relationship with the boys but I would not create it either. Sticking with the original plan.
He called once yesterday..to see if our morning "went okay".. about 300 mornings have passed since he left. Yes, it went okay. Didn't call the kids last night but that is typical. They are both testing for their next belts in Karate tonight, I did tell him about that in case he wants to come.
I saw a couple of intersesting things while I was driving around yesterday.
A very run-down mobile home park called "Optomistic Acres"
4 cows walking through a cemetary
In keeping with my interesting day I got to break up a fight. In a patients house. 4 adults screaming at each other when I arrived. In front of my non-responsive patient. What a scene.
I took it outside and told them that I did not know their mom very well..just wondering what it was that she did to deserve spending her last probably 48 hrs on earth listening to her children yell and curse at each other??
Then it was tears instead of screaming..much better. I can deal with tears. 2.5 hrs later and me hearing all sides of the "story"..we had a deal. cease fire to provide mom the loving and peaceful care that she deserves. Lots of hugs. even for me. A band-aid on this broken family but you can't fix 40 yrs in 2 hrs.
Another day today..wondering what it will bring. At least it's never boring!!
Thanks for the advise everyone. I'm going to leave it alone. Not going to say anything to him and not going grocery shoping for him. I told him in the beginning of all of this that I would never interfere with him having a relationship with the boys but I would not create it either. Sticking with the original plan.
He called once yesterday..to see if our morning "went okay".. about 300 mornings have passed since he left. Yes, it went okay. Didn't call the kids last night but that is typical. They are both testing for their next belts in Karate tonight, I did tell him about that in case he wants to come.
I saw a couple of intersesting things while I was driving around yesterday.
A very run-down mobile home park called "Optomistic Acres"
4 cows walking through a cemetary
In keeping with my interesting day I got to break up a fight. In a patients house. 4 adults screaming at each other when I arrived. In front of my non-responsive patient. What a scene.
I took it outside and told them that I did not know their mom very well..just wondering what it was that she did to deserve spending her last probably 48 hrs on earth listening to her children yell and curse at each other??
Then it was tears instead of screaming..much better. I can deal with tears. 2.5 hrs later and me hearing all sides of the "story"..we had a deal. cease fire to provide mom the loving and peaceful care that she deserves. Lots of hugs. even for me. A band-aid on this broken family but you can't fix 40 yrs in 2 hrs.
Another day today..wondering what it will bring. At least it's never boring!!
Replies
Wow.
I can relate to this... my father passed away last year in April, and then my mother became ill and passed in December. I was stunned to see so much old stuff come out from the shadows from siblings, grandparents, aunts and uncles. It really amazed me in a kind of sad way.
Sounds like you did a great service for your patient and her family. For some odd reason, it makes even me want to say \"Thank You\" :)
Bugger, sorry you dropped the peanut butter debate, I was enjoying it! Your day was much more interesting than mine - no cemetaries or cows around here. Gonna keep my eyes open tomorrow though.
My beginning is a big blur..most definately not looking around me.. not sleeping..not eating..a great big blob of anger that was trying to be okay for the kids. I think I\'ve come a long way..you\'ll get there!!
Look at you, super woman, breaking up a family feud, if only for a couple of days. The strange things you see when you open your eyes and live for the day, huh? I think it\'s a big sign that your miss independent with no need to for him. Moving on, discovering Cheri and just starting to be happy. I think he will get the picture if the kids bug him enough. Sad that if he misses the belt testing tonight. I wouldn\'t miss a moment. In the end, we will have our memories of our children. They will be by the sides of those who were with them. Smile, they are great kids with a damn good mom.
Well, when they go to settle the estate, the fights will probably start up again! You won\'t be involved at that point, though.
Gee, I\'m such an optimist....
nice thought but I follow the family for 1 yr after pt dies for Bereavement. Share this responsibility with the Chaplain. I get the \"complicated grief\"..I am sure that these people will qualify..lol