Very strange feelings today. I feel divorced. I have been divorced since November but still so much stuff between ex and I going on that it never really settled in. Think it is finally settling.
This is not a bad thing. Good actually. I have been planning and working on my issues for this summer. We are going to have a great summer. Beach in June and season passes to a really great place about 1 hr from here where we can hike. $880 a month for child care this summer. Almost caused a panic attack but I worked it out..by myself.. thought about asking ex to help but I didn't and I am glad.
Going to have a garage sale this Saturday. Told the kids that whatever we make can be thier vacation money. Hoping that will motivate them to PURGE!! We always kept a vacation fund jar..change all year but the boys wanted dad to have it. They felt bad that he didn't "get" to go to the beach last year. He didn't go because he left 1 week before we were leaving for vacation but they don't think about stuff like that. Don't really want them to. He probably won't go anywhere this year either and told me that he is not going to get the boys for his 2 weeks this summer if they don't have anywhere to go. I thought about telling him that the point of visitation is that they can still be involved with each other's lives. Not going to bother. They will be fine right here.
Last summer was SO bad.. for me anyway. I am looking forward to a great summer this year. I was talking to the boys and mentioned last summer being bad and Connor said..what was wrong with last summer?? Thought about it and we did take our vacation and I found a lake close by that we had never been to and we went there several times. I don't know how I did any of it.
I told them when ex left that things would not change as much as I could help it. I always took them to school, picked them up..ex was not home most of the time anyway so it was me and the boys. Now it is just official.
This is not a bad thing. Good actually. I have been planning and working on my issues for this summer. We are going to have a great summer. Beach in June and season passes to a really great place about 1 hr from here where we can hike. $880 a month for child care this summer. Almost caused a panic attack but I worked it out..by myself.. thought about asking ex to help but I didn't and I am glad.
Going to have a garage sale this Saturday. Told the kids that whatever we make can be thier vacation money. Hoping that will motivate them to PURGE!! We always kept a vacation fund jar..change all year but the boys wanted dad to have it. They felt bad that he didn't "get" to go to the beach last year. He didn't go because he left 1 week before we were leaving for vacation but they don't think about stuff like that. Don't really want them to. He probably won't go anywhere this year either and told me that he is not going to get the boys for his 2 weeks this summer if they don't have anywhere to go. I thought about telling him that the point of visitation is that they can still be involved with each other's lives. Not going to bother. They will be fine right here.
Last summer was SO bad.. for me anyway. I am looking forward to a great summer this year. I was talking to the boys and mentioned last summer being bad and Connor said..what was wrong with last summer?? Thought about it and we did take our vacation and I found a lake close by that we had never been to and we went there several times. I don't know how I did any of it.
I told them when ex left that things would not change as much as I could help it. I always took them to school, picked them up..ex was not home most of the time anyway so it was me and the boys. Now it is just official.
Replies
he left one week before vacation last year. Went anyway with the kids and did my best. that was it. Kids had fun and i had fun watching them but the whole week I was thinking about divorce stuff, my attny called a couple of times ( I already had one) Not the best vacation of my life but one of those \"you do what you have to do\" things.. this summer is going to be MUCH better..I love the beach. Look around for things to do. Those season passes were very reasonable and that will be \"our place\" this summer. I am going to take them there every weekend that i have them. We can hike and picnic and there is a waterfall that you can climb to and get under. I have been there before but the occational snake has scared me away. this summer I figure, hell..if I can survive a divorce I can survive a snake!!lolThis is going to be your rough summer. You will find something that the two of you can do.
Well good for you to still go on vacation even though you were in pain. Your kids will one day come to see what a great mom they have. Kids are a like a two edged sword, they make it difficult at times, but boy when your having fun with them there\'s nothing better. Maybe I\'ll take a vacation this year with the kids, didn\'t last summer. Just paid for the kids and wife to enjoy the beach.
you should take them somewhere.. make new traditions..I have tried (in vain) to get my ex to do that with my kids.. not going to try with him anymore but I am going to take my own advise!!! The beach is the familiar every summer (same house) for them but we are going to do some new things too.
My Counsellor told me to start making new memories for me and the kids, which made sense.I\'ve done it a few times - a trip to the beach, and visit to a national park. It is really hard to get motivated to pack up and go, but I invite a coupla extra kids along, and my don\'t notice that mum is a little sad. At the end of the day, I realise that I have had a good time and I am surprised and proud of the strength that I have to do these things.
we can all compare notes this summer!! I am trying to challenge mtself a little..hiking and snakes!!lol.. let the boys know that mom can do this stuff..don\'t expect them to sit around arranging flowers..
I never thought of summer at all - until now. I\'m in the thick of things - selling the house and trying to figure out a budget with the \"rough idea\" of what I\'ll have, as well as getting preapproved for a loan and trying to decide what house it will be in. Yikes. Now summer?!
I have 3 boys but the age range, while close for adults, is far enough apart due to adolescence to make it a little challanging. My 14 year old is going to Jamica with a friend. Anything else we do will probably be put on the ol\' plastic, but still, I can\'t let summer go by w/out doing something.
\"Building new traditions\" is great advice. I used to leave it up to the stbx where to go (she had no trouble spending $$ we didn\'t have) so I\'ll have to be a bit more budget (i.e. \"local\" ) minded but there\'s stuff to do here. I\'ll have to think about it. Great idea to think ahead.
not too much ahead for me..school ends in may here..big on summer plans this year since last summer SUCKED!!
Connor\'s \"what was wrong with last summer??\" Isn\'t it funny what the notice and what they don\'t? Even when stbx took vacation, it was a working vacation. Him and the #$%@ crackberry. Makes sense now. We\'ll be at the beach too. And I\'m thinking of amusement park passes. Just have to get over the \"family four-pack\" idea. Never offended until now...
Hooray Beer!!!Just thought I would through that out with all the talk of summer and the beach.
Last summer sucked here as well. July 5th and on. This year gonna be much different, Dodger games,beach,camping,etc. Still don\'t have that \"divorced\" feeling yet but know it won\'t be as bad as I first imagined.
Wow yard sale - now I know what I can do with this damn musical gear that stbx hasn\'t sold yet -- thanks for the idea :-)