Howdo journal.......feeling a bit up and down again, these weird feeling just dont seem to want to leave me alone for any length of time and its pissing me off....others seem to have times where they have no anxiety or no feelings of impending anxiety, but i still get it all the time...phooey.....On top of that the strange dreams are still in abundance, had a bad one the other night where my friends daughter got killed in a road accident. I hate those bloody ones because they always feel so real at the time and i feel like shit when i wake up. I know its my subconcious working things out, but hell, i didnt think i was that deep, so you think that it would stop after a while but no. I dont know why psycologists and people of a similar ilk want to see into peoples minds, i spend all of my time trying to get out of mine...i have tried it with alcohol and soft drugs in the past and now im trying it straight, so lets hope it might do the trick....thats why i have to laugh sometimes, because noone really knows how the brain works and yet it can bring some of us to our knees, how can this be.....I think when i come back in a different life i want to be an animal, at least then this 'fight or flight' syndrome will be of some use and will be understandable......only if i am an exotic animal let me be one where i can hunt down the poachers and the hunters out there who hide behind guns....if they want to take an animal down try doing it without the advantage of mans they wouldnt be so 'brave' then eh????ttfnxx