Hello journal, dont quite know how i feel today...i could go into an attack but i am trying not to, so lets hope it works........the reasons being for this is that my friend at work came in yesterday and told us that her mother has breast cancer, thats the third time for her, i mean for fuck sake how much more should this family endure. Im not a big comforter because i dont really like people touching me but i put my arm around her and did as best i could.....normally my defense mechanism is to try and make people laugh and i succeded, she said today that she had felt a little better for being at work and getting it off her chest. I also bought her a little love heart bunny with an inscription of hope on it, and we had a laugh today about how lame i can be in these circumstances. Honestly i am useless, but all i can do is listen and try to get her to think in the positive if i can, i am praying that all is well when they go for her mums ct scan next tuesday..please god if you are there help them out..............Next i found out that i girl i went to school with is in intensive care and it doesnt look good. They dont know whats wrong with her, first they though she just had the bad cold thats hitting everyone just now, and then they thought it was pneumonia, now they havent a clue..shes only 32 and its scary as hell, again i will say some prayers, she is already being prayed for at the chapel, so i hope it helps and she pulls through because her and her family are such nice people........Then today we learned that a young guy of 28 that comes into our pharmacy regularly was viciously murdered last night. He was stabbed through the heart and slashed repeatedly, they also slit his throat. If that wasnt bad enough his girlfriends 14 year old daughter was with him at the time. She is also a regular in our pharmacy, they had not been together long but were getting married this summer, seemingly this has been billed as a revenge attack for him 'grassing' up a guy to the police....... Really i have to ask, what the hell is the world coming to???? It seems that everywhere is fucked up and nobody gives a damn, for example in the paper today was a story about a man who had went out to tell two teenage girls to quiet down a bit because his seven week old daughter was trying to sleep, the next thing he knew he had been shot in the stomach by a man......its time the public were allowed to take some action back, the biggest problem in our society just now are unruley youths and gangs. They know that the police cant really do anything to them so that just helps escalate the violence. So i shall state here and now that if anyone or anything tries to hurt a member of my family then they had better hope that the police catch them before i do. All i want is to live in peace but if someone brings shit to me then they better be prepared for me to end it, and i will use any means available to me. I think that anyone else would do the same if one of their loved ones were hurt for no reason....... I wish that i were slightly more joyful at the moment, but just writing this down has calmed me alot, so hopefully by tomorrow i will be back to being a little more normal after all it will be burns night and i will have to post a poem of his in salute to the bard.........ttfn for now