Im being mauled by my cat so it is difficult to type.  Another stressful day at work, i did overtime so didnt get in to 7.30pm, didnt have as bad a feelng today as i have had the past few days but i dont know if this is something to do with the weird dreams that i have been having over the last few nights or not.  It probably is because when i was having my bad p.a.s then i couldnt sleep at all without having nightmares, the problem was that they were so vivid, so they compounded the feelings of unreality as well.  It always seems to be a vicious circle that you get into when you are low and then comes the struggle and fight to try to get back onto an even keel.

Eventhough it feels like the end of the world to me i have to try to reel myself back in with the thoughts that  so many other people have it harder so just keep trying. Perhaps screaming into my pillow will help?? lol.