Today brings mixed feelings for me. Around 6:15 tonight will be the anniversary of the time my house caught on fire. It's been 9 years, but it still feels like it was yesterday. One doesn't easily forget something horrific like this. I've told the story so many times, but I need to tell it again... It was Wed. January 6th, 1999. I was 18 years old and lived with my mother. My brother had just moved out and was living with his girlfriend in town. Some of your probably already know that my mom has mental issues and her and I don't get along so well sometimes. This day was no different. It was also 3 years since my parents got divorced. We were living in a brand new 2 story house on the marsh that we designed. It was beautiful. Well, to make a long story short...I came home from school at the normal time around 3:30. My mom was going through a bad time. She had just quit her job of 11 years. She was vice president of my grandfather's wire company. I think she had a nervous breakdown because shortly before the fire, I had moved in with my grandparents for a couple of months because my mom had basically lost her mind and was being very abusive towards me. But being Christmas time, we made up and I decided I would move back in with her because I didn't want to be a burdon on my grandparents. Less then a week after moving my things back into my mom's house..tragedy struck. I got home to find her in bed and doped up on something...probably xanax. Those were her favorite. She started yelling at me when I first came in. I could tell that night was going to be bad. She kept telling me she wanted to move away from her family or kill herself cause no one loved her...blah blah blah. I ended up going downstairs and blocking her out like usual. About 5:45 or so I hear the smoke alarm going off upstairs. I didn't rush up because I figured she was cooking something and it go a little smokey. It happened all the time. I waited a few minutes for the alarm to stop, but it never did. So, I ran up stairs and knocked on her door. (She usually kept it open because we had 5 cats and 2 dogs and the litter boxes where in her room. But this time the door was closed, so I tried to turn the handle, but it was locked. That's when I panicked. I grapped the portable phone and called 911 then I called my grandparents who lived about a mile away from us. During this time I hand run downstairs and up our back stairs to a screened in porch that was outside of her bedroom. I see her laying in the corner mubling something about a cigarrette falling into her trash can. I can't get to her though because the screen door was locked. If I was thinking right I probably could of torn the door down. But I was in panic mode. I see her bed on fire behind her and our pets were running around in a panic. By this time I hear the fire engines. I go down to flag them down since our road is a dirt road and at times hard to find. Of course they turned down the wrong road at first. My grandparents arrived at the same time. The firemen went up and busted the door down and got my mom out. I don't know how she didn't get burnt..some of her clothes had burns on them but her skin was ok. I was thinking the animals would be next to be recused. My mom's oldest dog followed her out with the firemen. But it was too late to rescue the others. We lost 5 cats and our baby chihuahua who was only 7 months old. That was the worst thing I have ever been through. At least my mom was ok. She was taken to the hospital and released the next day. She was really out of it and kept calling the cops on us saying we were abusing her. She was very dillusional and kept trying to run away. After a couple days she was back to normal. But we had lost everything. And also the cops were trying to pin the fire on my mom saying it was arson. They were saying that she set it on purpose for insurance money. She loved that house way too much to even think of doing that. She was later accquited, thank God. So, today is the anniversary of all of that. But today is also the day that my dad's town is throwing a benefit for him. I'm so excited about this. He has oral cancer, and just finished his treatments a couple weeks ago. He has no insurance and no way of working, so his town is getting together to throw a benefit to raise money for him. He's lived there for over 30 years and has always been a big part of the community...So today I am going through emotional ups and downs. I hope tonight turns out great. There's going to be great food, live music and entertainment. This town can party like there is no tomorrow! LOL I've gotta start getting ready for tonight. Thanks everyone for reading this. I will let you all know how it goes. Wish us luck! Jessica
Replies
Oh Sweetie,
What a hard day for you.I can only imagine all the emotions going thru your head today.But maybe going forward this day will have good memories of all the town is doing for your Dad and it will help to erase the bad memories of before.Its not a coincidense they are on the same day,sweetie.Everything happens for a reason.
Love you bunches,hang in ok?
Deb
That is such a sad story, I\'m sorry you had to suffer through that scary time. Is your Mom any better now? I hope you have a great time tonight, hugs Cathy
Not a pretty sight seeing your house being burned down. Didn\'t happen to me but one has to grieve in their own way to heal. I wish you the best for the benefit for your father. My hubby from a real small town and they have done that for many. Take care of yourself. Hugz. DT
such a tragedy for you and your mom.i am so sorry ...i hope things go well for your dad today.sounds like a great man ...hugs ..marie
i\'m so sorry. i hope you can lean on the good of today than the bad memory. i\'m here for you. let me know if i can do anything for you. take care. i\'m thinking of you. love and hugs, meg
What an emotional time for you. I hope all went well for you yesterday. Please know we are here for you.
WOW! i\'m sorry......hope the benefit/party was great fun! that\'s so cool that the town would do that for your dad! trish
YOUR DAD MUST REALLY BE LOVED!I\'M SORRY THAT YOU\'VE WENT THRU ALL THE PAIN YOU HAVE.I JUST HAD TO HAVE MY DOG PUT TO SLEEP AND IT\'S KILLING ME.SO I KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO HAVE TO LOSE YOUR ANIMALS,THEIR OUR BABIES.IT\'S GOOD THAT YOUR MOM AND YOU GOT OUT SAFELY.I HOPE YOUR DAY WENT WELL YESTERDAY!
have fun tonight hun. I know how \"anniversaries\" of tragic events can send us into emotional ups and downs...I will be thinking of you...hug hug hug
What a terrible and tragic memory for you to have to carry and the loss of your pets. I am so sorry honey. Some things are just to awful for time to even heal. We just learn to live with it and go on. I hope your dad\'s benifit goes well with a good time for everyone despite the cause for it. I am thinking of you. Love, Dale