i let him have it.  i told him everything that was bothering me and he's in the process of answering all of my questions.  i don't necessarily want to get back together, but i do want to know what happened.  there is a part of me that is so sad.  i miss him, and i miss the way i felt when he was near me.  i felt so safe and loved.  i have never felt that with any other man.  i never felt fat or ugly or any of those other things.  it's interesting to me that someone who seemed to accept me unconditionally just can't pull it together.  we'll see what he says i guess.