Thanks to all that send hugs. I so appreciate that it means so much to get those precious words of kindness.  Not sure where I'm at anymore thought I was moving forward seems I took a big step backwards maybe I'm just feeling sorry for myself i do know i miss ashley so much. I dont know. Just have been down so much these past few days. Wish I could wake up from this nightmare.  One day ok the next not thought I was past this..