ok holiday right around the corner ,makes me miss Ashley more, it has been incredibly hard lately, I find myself yelling more at my kids I just cant get into the xmas thing and I KNOW IT ISNT FAIR TO THE OTHERS AND i TRY but I dont want to celebrate or see xmas stuff it only reminds me of what I dont have anymore and it hurts so bad..another 17 yr old killed last wk walking to the busstop ran over by a pick up truck..and he wasnt even driving I keep saying only if I didnt let her drive to school here some poor boy gets killed going to his bus stop...why why so much tradegy? and the person that killed him another student , that now has to live with this..life really sucks...I dont think it ever will get easy I think I will learn how to put on "my mask" and make it thru but it will never be happy and full of joy as it once was,my heart has been broken and will never heal..I never thoought my life would be so full of pain. I only want what all mothers want to see their kids grow and become adults.......
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I don\'t understand the whys of all of it. We had a couple of teens killed last week as well. One crossing the interstate (why I don\'t know) and one sledding. Life really is fragile, it is taken in an instant. I\'ll be glad when the holidays are over as well. I try to stay upbeat for the others but you try to tell your heart and it doesn\'t cooperate. Thinking of you. Robin
you cant blame yourself for not being in the festive mood.Its just not possible.take care.
I feel the same way you do.I\'m cheating my other 2 children.I\'m trying real hard like you to put on a mask but we have to do it for the rest of are familys.I had my neice die June 1st from a overdose.Justin died from a overdose on march 21st.My whole family has had a bad year.But I will try to put a smile on my face for Justin.you hang in there,hug\'s,jfm24,vicki
We all know that tragedies happened before we lost our children. We just never \"really\" understood the pain. I used to ask \"WHY?????\" my son and then I realized how many are suffering the same pain and how many join us on this painful journey every day and the question is really \"Why should we be immune from the tragedy?\" We just all go along in our own blind way until it smacks us in the face and heart. We will never be the same. Our hearts will forever have a hole where our babies used to be. Maybe someday we will learn to carry on without so much pain. That is my hope for all of us here.