Friday I went to all souls mass, I cried thru the entire mass was like yesterday, really suckedI cant believe this time last yr I was in the hospital sitting next to Ashley praying and watching her and talking and telling her you will fight this and make it, I really thought she was coming home,maybe in a wheel chair but coming home and in 7 days of not leaving her side she would be gone ..I just cant believe it my world as I knew it was over, total denial, this cant happen to Ashley she had plans she had goals she had ambitions ,this just cant happen this cant be real..I look back and dont know where the time has gone. the feelings and emotions are just as strong as they were a yr ago, I am trying to pick up some pieces and its so damn hard, I feel like im in a haze again, cant believe I know I dont want to believe,why Ashley why our kids...so unnatural we shoulnt outlive our children.....
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It shouldn\'t happen you are right. I wonder everyday why why why? Hopefully we will know the answers when the time comes. Until then we just get through another day just as you are doing. I wish I could ease the pain for all of us mothers. We love our children so much. You have made it a year. Did you ever think that you would? Probably not and you did. Continue to endure and just remember the blessing of being Ashleys mom. What a blessing indeed. She will always be present in your heart until you meet again. Here for you. Love Robin