So here it is. I guess I should get it out...I have been raped twice. This is my first time trying to talk about one of them that I have completely blocked out. Talked to my boyfriend about the other because he was in my life when that one happened, just last year. The other happened 3 years ago, and he has no clue. I cant sleep and dont want to.  I just keep having nightmares of the one i cant talk about.  I have found that I have isolated myself from most my male friends because these 2 men that have raped me were both "friends". I try to tell myself that my friends wouldnt do that, but that has proven to not be the case. The only man I can trust is my boyfriend. But, I cant find the strength to tell him about everything. I think it is partially my fault. Long story, maybe one day I can write about it.