Interesting meetings this weekend with some unrecovered newcomer sharing and then some healthier recovered sharing refocusing all, thank God!  One friend even lied about working the steps, maybe he thinks otherwise I just was like, Red Flag!  I know the truth we've talked and t's an honest program so I may say something or I may just keep my distance.  Dishonesty to me is probably the worst thing I avoid. I saw T Saturay who said he wanted to let me know, that he didn't want to lead me on one way or the other with having told me he'd invite me to coffee.  He said he's my friend.  He said in 2 weeks he's going away for 2 weeks and he's not doing anything, not spending any money.  He said he didn't think he needed to say anything.  I said "it's alright".  I thanked him for inviting me to church, saying I still wasn't sure.  He said it's not a big event, it's like going to a meeting, it's an open invitation, I think he may have said he invites anyone.  His attitude was really like an excuse (which is like a polite rejection), using something from "He's just not that into you" book by Greg Behrendt.   I felt really weak and went home and got in pajamas and went to bed, and stayed in bed part of the day the next day.  Monday he'd walked me to my car and said he'd almost invited me out the night before, to an open mic thing.  I just needed to process and feel it.  I was pretty much in the throes of love addiction I guess. I did a lot of volunteer work Saturday night and played a lot of music, which was a therapeutic distraction. I felt really rejected and confused. I have had the last guy I went to a concert with act in way were I felt exposed and rejected, and now this, and even a girl in AA said her sponsor told her to call the same person everyday.  That person was me.  After one week I saw her and said I didn't know I was that busy to even answer the phone, which she said wasn' a requirement - voicemail was fine.  I never heard from her again. I'm trusting God.  I'm feeling like maybe T heard about my insane ex, I don't know why else he would suddenly be put off by me.  I told a friend in a meeting yesterday and was able to laugh about it - the down time really did help me process it.  My friend said maybe the guy's intimidated.   I just know I was having all these feelings towards him, like he opened up an interest in me since he seems like a really good guy.  At least I'm being drawn to healthier people ,and God gave me this information that T cared enough to tell me.  I also didn't want him to think I cared about having $ spent on me.  I'm quite unmaterialistic, but he doesn't know me well enough to know.  His friend new me, and I haven't seen him in 1 1/2 months. Maybe I put off a desperate vibe I don't know I thought I didn't say much at all. So I'm thinking game plan AVOIDANCE.  Like, I got really caught up emotionally and I need to stay away instead of going to meetings where I may see him.  I want to let go of my ego and be my authentic self. I need work on my love addiction.