I got to work one day this week as a background actor on a comedy in a mall.  It was really nice to see some old aquaintances I have worked with years past, and to meet some people, do something creative with the "acting", have some nice catering, much downtime to read, and to rest my mind while mostly usting my body in the scenes, with much walking and running in the scene. I have done that "career" for many years off and on and it felt good.  I found myself realizing the money I gave up at my old job, but money is not everything.  I am so so grateful to not be working there anymore, right or wrong, I think for me I just was not handling many things well there.  Not putting the job or the money before God is what helps me, that this is the lesson I need, to trust/have faith in God not $ or things or people. Today I found myself leaving my big book meeting early.  I am the treasurer who collects rent money and the secretary and I have had this sort of weird mostly unspoken liking for eachother, anyway he is real controlling of things and he was just a no show, and I got tired of covering his butt and let someone else handle it and asked someone to do my commitment, and left early and came here.  It felt good to let myself be burnt out and leave instead of expecting myself to be any different.  The secretary gave up his commitment last week to someone who couldn't take over until a few weeks from now, and apparently he just blew it off, and had all the books and treasurer information with him, and I just got fed up but I refrained from "blaming" him - he is sick just like most of us.  The last month he and I were both absent at differnt times, and coming back together was weird, and in celebrating his sobriety B'day I went ahead and gave him a card, a risk, and he said "Aaww" - I will remember that.  He deserves it.  It is the spiritual awakening that people get and live by in that program that is so amazing, and he has it, (at times). I got to lead a meeting yesterday.  It is always interesting in hindsight what I say.  I realize I am learning to have more grace with myself and shortcomings instead of beating myself up verbally for not being perfect, I am realizing perfection is NOT the goal, that progress IS. I helped mom with some gardening yesterday.  Life is rather mellow. Also, in the heat I feel rather lazy. I did pursue filling out one application for some temp work that sounds hopeful down the line., for a pretty great school where I used to temp.  I also called about some other work on the weekends, and the guy said when he'd call back and I could maybe start today, and he didn't, and I decided not to pursue work with someone who does not keep his word, as this was a major problem I just had with the supervisor of my last job.  I have not quite budgeted as good as I needed to have a few months of bills paid, but I am still ok.  I know I need to give my future to God, not worry, and just do my best to pursue some things as I am lead and inspired to.