I got a wonderful Thai massage Saturday - he does a great job, and it is a lot more affordable and better than at the hot springs spa.  I really needed it, and I'm glad I went ahead and treated myself.  I went to MA Saturdayand had lunch after w/ my sponsor and some ladies, a nice tradition. I got a little defensive a couple times with people being a little just rubbing me the wrong way, oh well, I am an addict!  My sponsor is getting older and her health is not wonderful, and it's kind of concerning. I'm planning to let my two new sponsees go - I don't feel they're following directions, and more importantly, I don't feel like I have the right stuff to offer right now.  I went to an Al Anon convention this weekend, and it was wonderful to attend the marathon meetings and speaker meetings.  I feel like I need to work this Al Anon program (as well as better at my AA / MA programs) in order to have healthier boundaries in general and to work with other alcoholics/ addicts. I have not heard from R, who in the last two weeks left one message last Tuesday calling me "baby" like normal, saying he hopes he gets in touch with me, and loves me - in a way it is comforting, and also good to have distance - there was much unhealthy about it and I think neither of us are ready for a relationship. A guy I dated last summer, he continues to call occasionally and I am not comfortable, but have said nothing yet, though growing increasingly uncomfortable.  Since Aug/Sept, I have returned one of his calls - though email general forwards on occasion - I plan to stop this.  I saw him today after the meeting and took off as soon as I did because I did not want to get sucked in - I guess this is a withdrawal tendency of mine due to my lack of healthy boundaries.  Anyway he rushed out to my car as I drove away and I said I had to go - Oh well, I don't want to be unkind, I just am really tired of him contacting me and I am not handling it great.  It's not mutual and it feels uncomfortable. I found out a guy who had pushed some of my boundaries, who I did volunteer work with, I found out he quit after being told he made a woman there uncomfortable, and if it happened again, he'd be out.  He demanded to know who his "accuser" was - (me), but they didn't tell him - I had no idea, the boss told me he quit due to the "economy" or something, after I asked her about it.  Our mutual friend told me he told the guy it had to be me, and also defended me for an issue where he'd crossed my boundary and became upset with me when I didn't acquiesce.  Weird - I guess another woman outside of the volunteer work has felt stalked by him and insisted he leave her alone.  I guess I overlook and play nice and go along and then, I get fed up and go the other way, and I was getting to that point with him, until he left.  I felt kind of bad about it but our friend helped me see it was his responsibility.   Honesty is so much better than playing nice, and I am glad I am making progress with this, self honesty.  I guess it is in creating boundaries with others that we put this into play.  He was inappropriate in so many ways I justified because he was so "nice" about it, and I am just glad some of it was out in the open.  I'd told my boss after he got upset, how he was too friendly and had asked me to dinner (he's married) and she made a face and said she was glad I said something and that she doesn't want anyone to feel uncomfortable, especially a woman.