My last night at work - tomorrow I come in the morning to work doing orientation for new students with my coworkers, who I had an interesting time doing "teamwork" with today.  I think I'll try to remember to tell them what my boss said, about maybe having the ability to bring me in part time as "relief". I am rather sad.  I am glad for those I have touched.  It's interesting to be in acceptance, especially when people are so desperate for jobs/work/money/security.  To me ALL security comes from God, so I don't put much weight in the other things, be it good or bad. I felt mad finding out once again my supervisor let me down with something she said she'd do, that once again affects my job, affects so much of everything - that is the primary problem here - shame in a way.  It is quite upsetting, but I think I am handling it for the best way for me right now. Work has calmed down so much from a month ago, when it was haywire - though I see moments of that approaching, and I am tiring of some things becoming monotonous and the general unethicalness of some things here. No word from R, who left message one msg this week that he hopes he could get ahold of me and loves me and called me "baby" as he does.  Is he "out" (relapsed)?? or on "restriction"?? again due to being kicked out of his treatment home and possibly reentering under previous terms (no phone calls).  Who knows.  I am leaning towards not reconciling, which is interesting.  "It's called a breakup because it's broken" book helps a lot.  The issue of trust is just so big. I really tossed and turned last night and hardly slept.  I'm sure leaving this job affects me in so many ways.  I am excited to be available for temp work and background acting, and to take some time to clean my room and get organized next week.  I have grown so much here and made great money for me, so I have a cushion for a little while. I had the hardest time coming in to work and planning to come in tomorrow, and I am having the hardest time staying my last hour or so.  I had a hard time staying at the meeting today.  I want to go to bed.  I want to watch TV and do yoga and eat and use the jacuzzi and read, and to be alone. I sit in here with nothing to do and I do hope as a dear friend said that maybe some inner wisdom in me made this choice.  Acceptance comes in shades of gray as no choice is black or white for me, truly.