This weekend I took a long walk with R.  He got a ride to my town with one of his roomates, and got to meet Mom.  I went to see him yesterday and felt grumpy when my "expectation" about something he did was not met.  He did help me take care of something wrong with my car which was nice. Today I come to work.  I am really struggling with my work ending and with this relationship.  It is time for me to get busy with my work on myself and do some serious 12 step inventory that has been accumulating. R is in this treatment program and he is getting better.  I am noticing in some ways, I am not.  I did go to Al Anon and AA today.  I think my self esteem is really suffering, and I am really accumulating some stuff I need to inventory (fears/ resentments) and get rid of.  I did call my sponsor today, I did come to work, I am doing my job.  I am feeling rather tired and grumpy.  I did have a lot of sugar lately. I went to the mineral baths and had a massage Friday.  I am doing yoga, but not nearly as much as I need to in order to de-stress.  I had a wonderful yoga class Friday, too.  I hope to find a job where I have passion and healing.  I have grown weary here.  I told one of my students I am leaving - she is graduating at the same time, anyway.