I am struggling a little with love addiction with the new relationship.  I see I am way too isolated and this leaves me vulnerable.  I see my mom is very isolated, and dad with his gambling addiction, it is just not healthy for her.The MA convention is in a couple weeks and I have stalled deciding on any plans, flights, hotel reservations.  I need to find out when my temp job check comes in.  i expected it by now. I slept in today and took a long nap.  Lazy day. I enjoy looking at my accomplishments, however minor. I did walk puppy.  i didn't do much exercise yesterday.  I am feeling sort of blue tonight.  Too much sleep, not a meeting today, a little under the weather with a cold, feeling lonely.  It is hard being in a relationship with someone who isn't really there for me, and it is selfish of me to expect this particular individual to be.  He is in a rehab.  I am feeling rather needy and vulnerable. It was real hard to hear about my ex the other day.  I was at a meeting Friday and an unfamiliar woman shared about him, described him I think.  It was like a heavy fog came over me, and I wrote about him for the first time in a month.  It had been so nice to not think about him.  Then in doing my research in last year's journal, I am reading about our messiness of back and forth.  It was so hard for me and is hard to read about.  I guess it is normal to have ups and downs - recovery is not completely an uphill climb, there are peaks and valleys, and overall it is up. I did make the bold move to call my counselor, after two no shows of my last two appointments.  She said she left me a message, like she used to say.  She must have an old number because over the years she's said that alot.  Anyway she said she'd call me the next day and never did.  We were going to wrap up our sessions.  I just deleted the number from my phone.  It hurts a lot to feel rejected when people don't call.  Yet, I did the same thing today, not call a friend I said I would.  When will I learn to stop judging.