Yesterday I opted out of the graduation ceremony for the recent graduates at the school where I work after a few days of working 2 jobs while sick. I'd just had enough and felt better just deciding to stay home, though struggle with guilt for turning down work.  I am also opting out of my volunteer work tonight, which feels like a smat choice.  There is loss of these choices, because they are things I enjoy, but I'm not feeling well. I'll miss my temp seasonal job and secretyly hope they'll offer me a more permanent position if the budget would permit someday. I have a great boss and enjoy working with her and it feels good to help her out and enjoy what I do.   Yesterday the guy from volunteer work who I decided I'm uncomfortable w/ how friendly he is, he told me and my boss about an opportunity he wanted me to do and he seemed to think it unthinkable I'd say "no", as he apparently promised I'd take part in some event I would not do.  Funny some people use networking and "I'll do for you if you do for me" and I don't want anything from him, and I look back at past instances of how he's tried to butter me up and say let me know if I need anything, anyway I am just glad I said "no".  He didn't say bye.  I also decided to have a more professional vs. personal association with him.  I was actually angry with his slyness and trying to sell me his idea instead of asking me directly, so I can say "no I don't want to do that thank you".   I'm so relieved I said no because I get the feeling he's the type that will take your inch and expect a mile. Anyway forgiveness in order.  It's really sad to hear about the unfolding drama of sis's family and her issues with a new guy and her husband wanting custody and all the pain going on. Good news is my nephew did get to go to a Lakers game with my Dad.  I am so glad they get some joy in their lives.  Apparently her Mr New pointed at my neice that the custody court hearing was "her fault" for talking about the situation.  Poor girl needs someone to talk to, her mom moving in a guy the day he leaves prison sentence of a decade without their dad knowing, who just moved out months before.  And for my sis to know her husband is angry, and her not having had forethought to see it coming, well I don't know.  I just need to not get into triangles of "he said she said" and try to stick with what the issue is with the person I'm talking to.  Starting Over TV show had a good episode on triangles.  I really need some work with my boundaries on those with my family.  Today the guy I last dated "formerly Mr. Now" anyway he shared that he got shoved by a guy he went up to at a store and asked if he wanted a ride to a meeting, the guy said he exposed his Anonymity and Mr. doesnt' see it, but is starting to care more about doing the "right" thing.  I thought it interesting and did not give my opinion, yes I think he exposed the guy's anonymity and it's not ok, and he ought to have apologized.  I used to  tell him I disagreed with his gossip and exposing anonymous material, anyway some grow quickly, others slowly.  I got a compliment and nice hug from Mr. East, that I'm "humble".  :)  Today I cooked a bit and walked the dog, and after going through with my treasurer commitment at the AA meeting today, not wanting to but needing to. I was absoluely wiped out and had a long nap. 3 day vacation.  Woo hoo.  Will probably do a lot of resting. I found out the VA significant other program to visit R is for spouses.  Makes sense to me.  He is in a strict rehab and I can't call him or anything.  I haven't heard from him in a few days.  He is such a super intelligent guy, yet he doesn't seem bothered he doesn't have an ID.  I guess I see potential. He's been on the streets a while as in being a drug addict with a hard life, but willing to change and a more responsible past. So I don't know.  He's where he belongs and I am grateful to have some time to myself.  It is an odd situation.  Probably my 2 closest AA friends are in relationships with non sober alcoholics and I know I am no different than them.  I guess I like someone, but it's hard to say I'm in a relationship when he's in this situation.  I don't  know.  Go slower than slow, which is time to back up for me.