Dealing with getting caught up in the cycle of verbal and emotional abuse, caught up in the cycle of trying to explain or even taking the blame, and second guessing myself.  Not healthy.  I'm sending mixed signals.  I need strength to stay away.  I need to get access to a computer as I usually don't have it at home when dad is there, he's a computer addict and I use his.  All I need to do is say no and have alternatives.