Some weirdness.  I wanted to write about this guy, Mr from out of town but used to live here,  and well how I feel drawn to him, and how I got out my "He's just not that into you book" when I felt like I did something wrong to not have things go how I wanted, and just the love/relationship addiction I tend towards and how prevalent it is for me and how it gets me off my path of healing, goals, growth. So anyway he seems pretty into me as of yesterday.  We went to the fair and a meeting together, and kissed.  Yes, it's like too fast, anyway it's neat to connect with someone.  I'm sober and this is a more casual thing than I'm used to in sobriety, as far as the fast progress, and I don't know him well enough to trust him well enough. I don't know I just wanted to come to the fair with me when I talked to him about going to the fair the day before, so yesterday when I said I'm going (it is across the street from the meeting) he asked if I wanted company, and told me he'd wanted to ask me out yesterday but the timing wasn't right. I have this pattern of needing women friends and clinging to a relationship. we left the campfire meeting early and hung out up in the mountains where it was, which is risky I know.  I saw some of the women from my womens meeting there and I went to the womens meeting today.  I felt convicted seeing them last night, like what am I doing????  I'm still karmicly connected to my ex, and I know maybe I always will be, I am just not ready for public displays of affection with someone new, so anyway it is all just too much.  It is nice to have some companionship I just want to go S-L-O-W. Anyway it looks like this sponsee is someone I am working with in the most beginning stages, and I know her from school when we were teens, so it is neat.  I  met with her today and it is a challenge to reach out, share some experience, strength and hope and LET GO.