Today ended up fun and spontaneous.  I showed up to see my niece who is turning 16 this month and my 13 year old nephew, and took them to lunch and for pedicures.  He'd never had one and was skeptical but agreed reluctantly, and we all laughed about it.  I know it took courage for him and it was a neat experience for us, and one I'm happy to share.  I know it is hard for them as my sis and her husband recently suddenly split up, and my sis is a little distracted and hard to pin down to say the least, so I am glad I can be in there lives and a better influence in sobriety.  I even saw a special AA friend getting a pedicure, too, which was super.  I am glad they appreciated the attention. I walked doggie and ended up up the street at a friend's new AA meeting and it was nice.  I walked to another friend's house and visited.  I am getting messages from the ex who just wants to talk to me and is at times hurtful, and was crying today.  I still don't respond and it is hard for me.  He tells me his mom is diagnosed with cancer and doesn't have long.  I don't know.  It's sad and upsetting.  I talked to his relative/friend who originally let me know how my ex had deceived me, and told me originally not to tell him I knew, and has since told my ex about it.  I hoped that would explain my distance, I don't know.  I told him I don't hate my ex I just asked him to not contact me a month and a half ago and he is continuing to call repeatedly, leave messages and texts daily.  I need some support through this.  I feel sad for him and I know my suffering is not going to change his suffering.  Fact is, he has recent relapse and suicidal tendencies and I don't know how I can change that, in fact as my counselor said, by trying to be there for him I may be keeping him from getting him help that can work.  I was drawn to his spirituality in the program and that is largely out the window, and it's just heartbreaking to watch him suffer.  I just prayed and went on my way.  I am hurting for him.  I keep him in daily prayer. I am tired.  I agreed to meet with my new male interest friend for a walk in the morning.  I am feeling a little overwhelmed.  I finally told him a few days ago that I recently got out of an unhealthy relationship and my ex doesn't want to let go.  He said "so you're done with your past but your past isn't done with you?"  Anyway he has a lot of insight into things and said maybe the ex did the best as he could and isn't capable of being honest (as our AA book says someting like "there are those unfortunates... those who do not have the capacity to be honest" that there chance of sobriety is threatened because of it).  He'd asked why we broke up and I said dishonesty, mental health issues, basic kindness and respect lacking...  anyway I agreed to go because I do like him and realize if I want people in my life I have to budge a little from my own selfish routines that are rather rigid.