I am absolutely down this weekend.  I try to do what  I can.  I try to not work.  I find out starting in a week I'll do two classes of independent study for a student for less hours than I'm getting paid to teach one class now.  One class will be economics and I've started reading the book.  The boss is flakey and hasn't let me know what the 2nd class is, not that I'd be jumping in to get prepared anyway.  I am getting tired of working many extra hours each week without pay in order to stay caught up in teaching - the life of a teacher.  I understand why they say teachers don't get paid a lot. I have made it through math and they'll take their final this week, and probably 1 or 2 will fail, which is excellent considering the average math class, and we are ranking very high in attendance which is great.  Success.  It helps to know God knows what my days have in store for me and I need not worry. I think I'll shower and go to a meeting.  It always seems to help.  I guess I'm down seeing how unstable the ex appears to be.  I am also sad Mr. New in my life didn't call when he said, and realize I need to address this issue because it is not ok, and I can say it nice, it is just not something I want to deal with, and it is all ok. In the last month since our breakup I have cried a total of 3 times, very atypical for me to cry so little.  After a year of breakups I've spent enough energy crying over him. I stared goal to "get organized" because I'm sick of living in clutter and CHAOS (flylady.net says "can't have anyone over syndrome").  I haven't made a dent in it.  I guess I procastinate and like to watch tv. I'm dealing with a little depression, something that was a regular part of my life.  I'm not reaching out much and letting little problems get to me.  I know I need to count my blessings and surrender it all to God. Funny how this old friend in my life, who I had my last drink w/ 3 1/2 years ago, is back in my life, and may be sending me "vibes".  I used to have a big crush on him. Funny how the timing is.  I haven't told him I'm in AA because I don't think he'd be supportive.  Anyway it has my head spinning a little, flattered, just not knowing how to deal with this.I guess I need to be glad I am not dating.  A month after a breakup is too soon.  And I appreciate the advice I received that if a rebound relationship doesn't work, it can be more devastating than the original breakup.