Car returned fixed pretty well. '81 924 Porsche that cost $1k.  I'd prayed for a mechanic that knew how to work on them.  My last mechanic was far from "getting" that car.  So I randomly called a place I'd been to a few years ago and they referred someone whose been working on the cars since they were new and is a 20 minute walk from home.  He charged a good price and clued me in to what needed to be done.  It's still far from perfect, but feels good. I feel like I don't recognize myself.  I have a teaching job.  I have good relations w/ my family (somewhat).  I am professional.  The boyfriend is out of my life (I am still so shocked at how mean he became, and cold.  He's come a long way since I met him and regressed less than zero from where he was, where he'd been in his past oh well).  Today I shared at AA, and mom came.  She asked to come to a meeting.  She needs a support network, with her sis having recently passed away, and her spilling the news today my sis may be separating (devastating for the family and her teens - just a shock).  So mom came - and I was asked to lead the AA meeting! I used to fantasize about bringing mom and being able to share.  I'd never brought her.  It was amazing I could share my honest story with her there.  I had tremendous shame and coming out to her as an addict/alcoholic 1+ year ago (after 2 years clean and sober) was one of the hardest  things, something I thought I could never do.  And she didn't judge.  Wow. Teaching is going well, better than expected.  Correcting homework took 3 hours today for one night!  I get paid 2 hrs for the class and 45 mins prep work.  It's closer to more than twice that,  but maybe next class it will be easier.  They last 5 weeks.  Kids are great, straight outta high school, and we're learning college algebra together.  I think I am pretty good at it, natural at math. It has been a life saver to have a job finally that doesn't give me free headspace to wonder about the ex.  I think he projected a lot of bs including his disatisfaction w/ me onto me.